


Sentinel, Interrupted

by elaine



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Alternate Universes, Drama, M/M, Sentinel Senses, Sentinel/Guide Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-08-04
Updated: 2003-08-04
Packaged: 2017-12-11 08:57:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/796336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elaine/pseuds/elaine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten year old Jimmy Ellison needs a guide. But when Blair arrives at the Sentinel Institute, Jimmy's need to protect his guide outweighs his sense of self-preservation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sentinel, Interrupted

**Author's Note:**

> In some countries, this story contains underage sex. In my country the age of consent is sixteen, regardless of gender or orientation, so it doesn't.

Sentinel, Interrupted

On a long, hot, spring afternoon any chance of distraction was welcome, particularly to a group of intelligent, active ten year olds. But one of them, a sturdy, sandy haired boy watched and listened through the restless murmurs of his classmates as the lab-coated doctors spoke quietly with his teacher. He smirked slightly; you’d think by now that they’d realise that sentinel hearing was more than capable of eavesdropping on their conversation.

Maybe they were counting on none of the children being interested; after all, most of the other kids were far more concerned with the possibility of being dismissed early from their class than listening in on their elders. Especially when those elders were… well, boring. But Jimmy Ellison _was_ interested. And worried. He was the only un-guided sentinel in his class; some of his group had been paired with their guides for nearly two years. He didn’t know what would happen if he didn’t get a guide, but there were stories… frightening stories about sentinels going rogue and being put down.

This time, it seemed, they _were_ talking about him. As if to confirm what his ears had already told him, three pairs of eyes turned to look at him, and Jimmy hurriedly pretended to be interested in what Erin was telling her sentinel, Marta.

“Jimmy. Jimmy Ellison, can you come here please.” Ms Torrence’s voice cut through the rising babble of the other twenty children with ease. “The rest of you get back in your seats.”

He rose and walked to the front of the classroom. The two doctors looked down at him assessingly.

“Jimmy, you’re to go with Dr. Lawrence.” Ms Torrence smiled reassuringly. “Don’t worry. It’s good news.”

He nodded, his mouth suddenly too dry for speech and followed the two men out of the classroom. He knew the younger man, Dr Al-Bakir, but he’d never met Dr Lawrence before. He was pretty sure that Dr Lawrence was someone high up at the Institute, and that knowledge made his stomach squirm. Maybe they hadn’t found a guide. Maybe he was going to be terminated, like some of the kids had said.

But Dr Lawrence was looking down at him curiously. “Well, Jimmy, we’ve finally found you a guide. What do you say to that, hmm?”

“It’s… uh, that’s great, sir.” Jimmy glanced up and then looked away. He didn’t like being looked at like he was some kind of specimen on a slide. The doctors who looked at the kids like that were the ones they all hated the most.

“It hasn’t been easy finding a match for you, young man.” The fake joviality made Jimmy flinch inside. “He’s… well, he’s a little younger than we usually accept into the program, but his tests show he’s an excellent match for you and he’s very advanced for his age. Small, though. Don’t let that put you off.”

“I won’t.” Jimmy looked at Al-Bakir, but the younger man was staring straight ahead and seemed upset about something. That was worrying; of all the doctors, he was the kindest, the one who treated Jimmy like a real person. But suddenly, he could hear something else; the sound of a heart beating light and fast, like a bird’s. Like a frightened bird. Unconsciously, he quickened his pace, missing the exchange of satisfied glances above his head.

“This way, Jimmy.” Dr Lawrence gestured towards one of several doors, although Jimmy was already turning towards it. “Just be… be careful. He’s just arrived and he’s a little nervous.”

Nervous wasn’t exactly the word Jimmy would have chosen to describe the tiny whirlwind he saw as he entered the room. Dr Lawrence hadn’t been exaggerating, the boy looked like a real baby, no older than Stevie had been when the Institute doctors had come for Jimmy and taken him away from his family. Like a baby, he’d been crying, but as Jimmy watched the small, flushed face grew alarmingly purple and the enormous blue eyes scrunched shut and the rosebud lips parted to emit a shattering scream of fury. The little boy followed that up with a torrent of swear words that were dirty enough to make Jimmy blink in shock, and then smother a grin.

“Jimmy, why don’t you go talk to him. The presence of another child might…” Dr Lawrence looked at him appealingly and Jimmy’s grin grew. They didn’t know what to do with the little brat.

He walked over to the tiny figure and put a hand lightly on the boy’s shoulder. “You shouldn’t talk like that. Who taught you those words?”

Amazingly the boy stopped. His breath hitched on a sob and he raised his arm to scrub away the tears from his face, ignoring the snot that ran down over his mouth and chin. “Mommy’s boyfriend. He said not say them in front of her.”

His voice was rough with tears but still had the piping quality of the very young. Jimmy stared down at him, wondering why he’d been brought here. Most kids didn’t even enter the program until they were six or seven, and then they were paired up with kids roughly their own age.

He smiled tentatively at the boy, feeling an overwhelming urge to comfort him. “What’s your name?”

“B… Blair.” Tears welled up in the blue eyes again and Jimmy hugged the kid carefully. He caught sight of the doctors pretending not to watch them, but ignored them and led Blair to a couch.

“Have you got a tissue?” He helped Blair blow his nose and wipe his face. “My name’s Jimmy. Do you want to stay here with me?”

“I _want_ my Mommy.” But Blair leaned in confidingly against Jimmy’s side and, disarmingly, fell fast asleep.

***

“…and this one goes here, and _that_ one…” Blair reached for the final piece of the 3-D puzzle, “goes _there_.” He grinned triumphantly up at Jimmy.

“Okay, so you’re smart _and_ cute.” Jimmy grinned, feeling Blair’s happiness as if it was his own. If he’d been told two days ago he’d be spending all his time with a three year old _and_ enjoying every minute of it, he would have been outraged. Yet, here he was.

It helped that Blair really _was_ smart, would grow up to be far smarter than him probably. It helped that Blair was his guide. But most of all, Blair was just… _Blair_ … and therefore irresistible from the top of his dark, soft curls to the soles of his tiny feet. They’d hardly spent a moment apart since their first meeting. Blair had been moved into Jimmy’s room that same day, without bringing even the small bundle of personal belongings that most children brought with them to the Institute. He’d only had the clothes he’d been wearing.

Jimmy hadn’t asked. In the four years he’d lived here he’d seen a lot of kids arrive, most of them in tears and homesick for their parents, sisters, brothers. After a while they stopped talking about going home and settled into the classes and physical training, finding friends amongst their age-mates, and then pairing up with their guide or sentinel when he or she arrived. It would be easier for Blair if they just didn’t talk about it, so they didn’t. But each night Blair had crept into his bed and cuddled up against his side and cried a little before falling asleep.

Blair cast him a wicked grin before sweeping his arm around and scattering the painstakingly erected structure. Jimmy rolled his eyes. If they stayed in here they’d have to clean up the mess, so it came as no surprise when Blair scrambled to his feet and stood, hands on hips, staring down at him.

”You wanna go outside?” It was a challenge. They were supposed to stay inside while Blair adjusted to the Institute; a fact that Blair well knew.

It was such a beautiful, sunny spring day outside, and right now there wasn’t anyone out there. All the other kids were in class, but Jimmy had been excused from classes while he and his guide bonded. Surely it couldn’t do any harm.

“All right, but only for a little while, okay?” If they got caught, Jimmy resolved to take the blame. Blair was just a baby, too young to be shut in a detention room for hours on end, which was the usual punishment. Besides, he couldn’t bear to think of Blair being alone, or frightened.

They slipped out of the door and ran for the bushes, Jimmy dragging Blair along by the hand as his shorter legs struggled to keep up with the older boy. They collapsed behind one of the bushier bushes, giggling. It was surprisingly easy to find a place where they could bypass the security fence and emerge halfway between the roadside and the lake. Jimmy hadn’t been outside since he’d first arrived at the Institute, though he’d heard stories of kids who _had_ snuck outside. It was almost expected that they’d try, as a demonstration of their sentinel abilities. Still, most of them got caught, and Jimmy had never dared to try without a guide to stop him from zoning.

“Can you swim?” Jimmy smiled down at Blair, trotting by his side.

The dark head shook solemnly. “Mommy was gonna teach me when we got to California. It’s too cold up here, she said.”

“Well, I can teach you. But not today,” he added hastily as Blair’s eyes gleamed. There was a chill in the wind today that might just be warning of a late snowfall. “It really _is_ too cold today.”

Blair’s bottom lip jutted threateningly for a moment, and then he relented. “Okay. Hey, is that a blue jay?”

In a moment he was off, chasing the bird, imaginary or otherwise. Jimmy certainly hadn’t seen it, and he was the sentinel, after all. “Blair! Hold on, short stuff. Wait for me.”

But Blair had probably never waited for anyone in his brief life and obviously wasn’t about to start now. He disappeared between two bushes and Jimmy ran after him, extending his hearing to track his guide’s progress. A high-pitched shriek made him flinch and hurriedly dial down his hearing as he’d been taught. It came much easier now that Blair was with him.

Then he heard someone else. Throwing all his energy into running, Jimmy plunged along the barely visible track Blair had made and skidded to a halt. It was a woman. Maybe the prettiest woman he’d ever seen, with pale, pale skin and red hair like leaves in autumn. She was holding Blair tightly against her, and Blair was saying over and over again “Mommy, Mommy, Mommy.”

She looked too young and too pretty to be anybody’s mother, even a little kid like Blair, but there was a look of determination in her eyes that wasn’t pretty at all. Then she looked down at her son’s dark head, pressed against her shoulder and stroked the little fist that held tight to the front of her dress and Jimmy _knew_. He just knew that she _was_ Blair’s mother, and that she wasn’t leaving without her son.

“Sweetie… oh, baby, it’s all right. We’re going away from here. Everything’s going to be all right.” She looked up defiantly at Jimmy. “We _are_ going. I won’t let those horrible men take my baby away from me.”

Jimmy swallowed and nodded. It would be so easy to stop her. He only had to yell loud enough, long enough, and the security patrol would come. It was a miracle they hadn’t already. He couldn’t do it. He knew what she meant. The people who ran the Institute, the doctors who poked and prodded and tested, the orderlies who were supposed to look after the younger kids but more often than not neglected them, the teachers who turned a blind eye to the abuses that older kids sometimes visited on the younglings… he didn’t want Blair to suffer at their hands. He’d been determined to protect his young guide, but it was better for Blair to go with his mother.

He took a step backwards and saw the pity in her eyes. “Can I say goodbye?”

Blair looked up then, his small face flushed and happy, but the happiness was already turning to puzzlement. “Mommy? Jimmy’s gonna come too.”

“No, I… I can’t, Blair.” Jimmy choked back a sob. “I have to stay here. I can’t go with you.”

“No!” Blair wriggled down from his mother’s arms and before she could stop him, he’d run back to Jimmy’s side. “You gotta come, Jimmy. You _gotta_ …”

“I _can’t_.” They were both crying as Jimmy hugged his guide for the last time. He lowered his head and took a deep breath of soap and clean sweat, instinctively memorising the Blair-scent. His fingers brushed lightly over fine, silky curls, cupping the small skull beneath. Blair’s body felt so terribly fragile in his arms, and it was almost more than he could bear to gently release his tiny guide. He swallowed and wiped his tears away with the back of his wrist. “You have to go with your Mom, okay? I’ll be all right.”

“Will you?” Blair’s mom spoke softly. The sympathy in her voice and face told Jimmy she knew what he was. “I’m sorry, Jimmy. I’d take you with us if I could.”

“They’d only come after us.” Jimmy spoke with bleak certainty. Guides could be found easily, for the most part, but sentinels were rare, and sentinels like him, with all five senses, were rarer still. They’d never let him leave. “You’d better go.”

He gave Blair a little shove, back to his mother. Blair stumbled towards her, sobbing heartbrokenly, and looking back over his shoulder at Jimmy. It was more than he could bear, and he turned and ran, half blinded by tears and sobbing. If he got back inside without being caught and went to his room, then it could be an hour or more before anyone realised Blair was gone. He’d manage it somehow. For Blair.

***

**thirteen years later:**

“Mom, for crying out loud…” Blair flung his arms wide and stared at his mother impatiently. “You’re always saying how smart I am. All I want to do is go to college.”

“Oh, sweetie, what do you want to do that for?” Naomi’s face showed a mixture of amusement and unconcern. “They’ll only try to brainwash you with their middle class, academic, short-sighted agenda. You don’t need college. Besides, you’re too young.”

It wasn’t an argument that Blair would willingly accept. At sixteen, he was used to fending for himself while his mother spent days and even weeks on retreats and meditation groups. College was no great step from where he already was.

Perhaps Naomi recognised that. She smiled placatingly. “I don’t mean you’re not ready, I just mean why should you go where everybody will be so much older than you? Why not wait a couple of years? We could go to Nepal again. There’s a monastery there where you could…”

“Thanks, but a monastery isn’t my idea of a good time, Mom.” Blair grinned in spite of his irritation and scrubbed at his growing halo of curls. “I want to _do_ something, to have some structure in my life. I want to _learn_.”

“Blair, the whole world is your teacher. Just tell me where you’d like to go, what you’d like to do and we’ll do it, I promise.” Naomi looked appealingly at him. “I’ve neglected you lately, but I’ll make it up to you.”

“Mom, you haven’t neglected me.” Blair sighed and went over to hug his mother. Capricious and stubborn as she could be, he adored her and wouldn’t accept criticism of her, not even self-criticism. “I don’t want to go anywhere. I just want… to be normal. To be a college student, living in dorms and taking classes just like other guys my age.”

“You can’t.” Even Naomi blinked at the baldness of her words. “Sweetie, I’m sorry, but you can’t do that.”

Now, at last, they were getting to the heart of things. Suddenly nervous, Blair swallowed and forced himself to ask. “Why not, Mom?”

“Oh honey…” She stroked his face tenderly and smiled. “When you were just a baby some men tried to take you away from me. I got you back, but ever since then we’ve been… well, hiding.”

Blair stared at her in silence and she looked away slightly guiltily. A lot of things from his peripatetic childhood were suddenly beginning to make sense. “That’s why I never went to school? Why we were always moving around?”

Naomi nodded, her eyes filling with tears. “I know it wasn’t the best life for a young child, but I had no _choice_ , Blair.”

“It was a great life, Mom.” He hugged her again, hating to see her upset. Besides, it was so unnecessary. He’d had a great time, travelling, seeing incredible places, meeting wonderful people. Not in a million years would he ever regret it. “But do you really think they’d still be looking for us after all these years? Who were they?”

“They’ll be looking.” Naomi muttered darkly under her breath. “Those people never give up.”

Blair sighed in frustration. “ _Who_?”

“The people from the Sentinel Institute, of course.” She nodded at his stunned exclamation. “They had a bad reputation, even then. I knew they wouldn’t treat you well, and you were only a baby. Far too young for that place.”

“But, I’m not a sentinel.” He closed his eyes frowning, forcing his racing mind to still long enough to make sense of her revelations; and then he realised. “A guide. They wanted me to be a _guide_! But you told me…”

“I couldn’t let them test you again. They would have been sure to find out who you were, and then I would have gone to prison and there’d have been nobody to make sure they treated you well.” Naomi clutched at his arm, her expression desperate. “You _do_ understand, don’t you?”

“I understand.” He _did_ understand, but it had been his dream as a child to be a guide, when most other children had wanted only to be a sentinel. When Naomi had told him he had failed the tests every six-year-old undertook – tests he realised now he must never have taken – it had been a devastating blow. “I do, really. I just wish…”

“And I felt so sorry for the boy. He seemed like a nice boy. And he understood, I think.” Relief, as usual, made her more talkative. “He said you should go with me.”

“There was a boy?” Blair felt himself growing cold. His heart began to beat hard against the inside of his ribs. He felt almost light-headed. “A sentinel? Mom, do you have any idea what you’ve _done_? Who was he?” And suddenly, he knew. Jimmy. His so-called invisible friend. The one he’d talked to for years, until he’d finally given up waiting for answers. “Oh, my god, Mom…”

Jimmy was a sentinel. A sentinel who needed a guide. All kinds of pieces were falling into place, like the pieces of one of those 3-D puzzles he’d loved so much as a child. Suddenly he heard a voice, a child’s voice, saying ‘okay, so you’re smart _and_ cute’, but he couldn’t quite bring the face into focus. Jimmy… he closed his eyes against the tears gathering there. Jimmy was real.

“I have to go, Mom. I have to find him.” Blair turned towards his room. He could pack a bag. It wouldn’t take long to get to the Institute, a day at most, and then…

“Honey, you can’t.” Panic edged Naomi’s voice. “If you go to those people, they’re going to want to know where I am. They’ll put me in prison, Blair!”

“I won’t let them. Mom, it’ll be all right.” Blair could feel the urgency rising inside him. So much that he hadn’t understood before made sense now. He was a guide, and his sentinel needed him. Had needed him for years. “If they want me they’ll have to leave you alone.”

“Blair, I can’t take that chance.” Naomi’s voice was more determined than he’d ever heard it, and that was saying something. “If you go to that place, I’ll have to leave. And I won’t be able to tell you where I’m going.”

She meant it. She really meant it. How could she make him choose like that? But a part of him understood. She’d spent her life hiding from these people, protecting both of them. But he _had_ to go. He could no more have stayed away than he could have decided to stop breathing. “Don’t you understand? He needs me. I’m his guide and he needs me.”

“He’s probably got another guide by now, sweetie. It’s been thirteen years. You were only three.”

“He hasn’t. I know that.” His absolute certainty silenced her. “I can’t even imagine what it’s been like for him all those years. Mom, please…”

Blair watched his mother take a deep breath and close her eyes. She let it out slowly. “All right. I’ll go away for a while, but I’ll find a way to keep an eye on you. Just in case.”

He hugged her impulsively and kissed her cheek. “It’ll be okay. I promise.”

***

“Blair, it’s wonderful to see you again.” Dr. Al-Bakir held out his hand and Blair took it cautiously. “I don’t suppose you remember much about your last visit here?”

“No.” Blair suppressed a yawn. It had been a long day. He’d left the ashram early, hitched a ride into the nearest city and walked into a branch office for the Sentinel Institute mid-morning. Now it was evening and he’d been either travelling or undergoing physical and psychological tests all day. “Can I see him?”

“Ah. Well, it might be best if you waited until morning.” Al-Bakir turned and began to lead the way deeper into the building. “In fact, once you’re in possession of all the facts, you may decide it’s better not to meet him at all. I’m afraid Jimmy is not… well, he’s not in a very good state.”

“I _want_ to see him.” Blair’s heart began to pound. He couldn’t have come this far just to be denied. He _couldn’t_. “It’s the only reason I’m here. I’m his guide. What use am I to you, if I’m not with him?”

The older man stopped and looked down at him curiously. “There’s a reason you were brought here, originally, at such a young age. Your test scores were quite astounding, and Jimmy was already showing signs of being difficult to pair with a guide. The fact is, we believed you could bond with just about any sentinel, which gave us hope that it would work with Jimmy.

“We still believe that, Blair. Although you’re now a little older than normal, we think there’ll be some young sentinel who would be willing to pair with you. And if not, then you would be invaluable in training and recruiting both sentinels and guides.”

“No.” Blair shook his head stubbornly. “I want to see Jimmy, and I want to see him _now_.”

“All right.” Al-Bakir sighed. “I have to warn you, he may not recognise you. When puberty started and he was still un-guided, Jimmy began to behave erratically. It was necessary to medicate him with drugs that would suppress his abilities. He’s now been on that medication for ten years. Even at the best of times, he’s not very… aware of his surroundings.”

Unconsciously, Blair quickened his pace. Every moment he lingered was a moment that he could be spending with his sentinel. “Where is he?”

“This way.” The doctor led him down a hallway lined with doors and into a small annex. “This is our long-term care facility. Mostly it’s for sentinels who burn out or are injured while on duty. Jimmy’s room is over there.”

Blair went to the door Dr. Al-Bakir indicated. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and walked in.

It was only a small room. There was a bed and a chair. Jimmy was in the chair. It must be Jimmy, although the tall, thin, dark-haired young man was completely unfamiliar to Blair. Then Blair saw that his arms were restrained in wide cuffs attached to the chair.

Fighting back tears and anger, Blair pitched his voice low. “Jimmy?” No, that felt wrong. This was not the fair-haired boy that Blair remembered as his invisible friend. “Jim? It’s Blair. I’ve come to see you.”

The dark head lifted slightly, but Jim’s pale blue eyes were unfocused. He swung his head slowly from side to side, listening. Blair moved closer, until he was right in front of the chair. Jim sniffed suddenly and his forehead crinkled.

“Yes, it’s me, Blair.” He knelt in front of the chair and put his hand lightly on top of Jim’s. He stared up into a thin face with prominent cheekbones and a strong jaw. “It’s Blair. I’ve come back.”

Jim’s head began to droop, and his eyes closed. Blair started to undo the cuffs that restrained his wrists, struggling with the stiff binding. Then he unfastened the straps across Jim’s chest, lap and ankles. Anger simmered beneath the surface, though he didn’t dare let it show, for fear that Jim might misinterpret it. How could they treat _anyone_ like this, let alone one of their own? Naomi had been right about this place.

When Jim was free, Blair reached up and touched his sentinel gently, stroking back the fine dark hair from his face. Jim leaned into his touch, inhaling deeply as his face turned in to Blair’s palm. Unable to help himself, Blair stood and leaned into Jim, wrapping his arms around Jim’s neck and pressing his face against Jim’s cheek.

“It’s going to be all right. It’s going to be all right.” He kissed the corner of Jim’s mouth and saw, even in the dim light, the tip of Jim’s tongue come out to taste. Saw the frown when, presumably, Jim’s senses failed him. Desperate, Blair crawled onto Jim’s lap and dragged Jim’s arms around him. He pulled at the surprisingly heavy body until they were as close as they could possibly be.

Jim’s hands slid over his back, searching, and finally came to rest with one hand beneath his shoulder blade, where he would be able to feel Blair’s heartbeat. He nuzzled Blair’s face, then dropped his head so his face was buried against Blair’s throat. He sighed. “Blair.”

***

He should have known that they would be monitored. Scant moments after Jim murmured his name, the tiny room was filled with people exclaiming and wanting to examine Jim. The sudden confusion sent tremors running through Jim’s body, and when someone grabbed his arm it was the last straw. He jerked it free and almost tumbled to the floor. Blair, who was half on, half off his lap was sent flying.

That was all it took. Before Blair could do a thing, four orderlies had Jim face down on the floor, though he fought them with a strength that belied his wasted body. Blair launched himself at the nearest, yelling at them to stop. He was immediately hauled off again by yet another orderly.

“Blair, calm down. Jimmy needs to be sedated.” Dr Al-Bakir caught his arm when he would have thrown himself back into the fracas. “Please, let them do their job.”

“Make them leave him alone!” Blair tried to twist free. “He was all right ‘til everyone came charging in here. You startled him.”

“This isn’t the first time Jimmy has become violent, Blair. This is for his own safety.” The concern in the doctor’s face was genuine, but it only made Blair more desperate.

“I can _help_ him! I’m his _guide_!” But it was too late. Jim’s struggles were rapidly diminishing and after a moment the orderlies released him. Freed at last, Blair dropped to his knees beside the slumped body, fighting back tears. “Jim? Jim, listen to my voice. It’s all right. I’m right here with you. I won’t leave you. Not ever again.”

The sound of a throat clearing behind him made Blair look up. “I really think you ought to reconsider. To be honest, I’m very much afraid that Jimmy’s beyond help.”

“No! You saw how he responded to me. I can help him.” If there was one thing he was sure of, it was this. “I want to stay with him.”

Al-Bakir looked doubtful. “I suppose you could sit with him for a while.”

Blair nodded agreeably. He had no intention of leaving, ever; but the doctor didn’t need to know that. He waited impatiently for the orderlies to turn Jim over and lift him onto the narrow cot that stood against one wall, then sat beside his sentinel, gently stroking his arm. Gradually, the room emptied.

Last to leave was Dr Al-Bakir. He stood by the bed looking down at sentinel and guide. “I’m truly sorry, Blair. I really tried my best with him, but he simply couldn’t control his senses without a guide, and he was becoming a danger to himself and others.”

“I understand.” Blair didn’t take his eyes off the angular planes of his sentinel’s still face. He brushed a fingertip down one pale cheek noting how Jim seemed to respond even to his lightest touch. He felt as if his heart might break. “But now I’m here, Jim’s going to be okay. I know he is.”

Somehow, he didn’t think he’d convinced the doctor, but the older man sighed and moved away. A moment later the door shut and they were alone again. Blair kicked off his shoes while fighting back a huge yawn and slipped under the covers with Jim, still fully clothed. He snuggled up against the thin frame and wrapped an arm around his waist. In spite of all that had happened, sleep claimed him immediately.

***

Next morning Blair woke early, even before the nurses and orderlies had begun to stir. It felt so right to lie beside Jim and listen to his slow, steady breathing. So many years spent apart, and yet the connection was there between them. The rest of his life would be spent with this man. Blair had devoured every scrap of information he’d been able to find on sentinels and guides. He’d been obsessed with the subject for years. Hell, he probably knew as much about them as anyone on the planet; he’d just never expected to be one of them.

It was a wrench just to get out of bed and move to the door on the other side of the room. It contained, as he’d hoped, a bathroom – tiny and extremely utilitarian, but good enough. He could stand a shower right now.

Emerging ten minutes later, absently rubbing himself dry with a towel, he returned to perch on the side of the bed and realised that Jim smelled none too fresh either. He pulled carefully at the hospital issue pants and tunic until he’d managed, with a little co-operation from a half-awake Jim, to strip his sentinel down to bare skin.

The sight of Jim naked made Blair’s breath catch in his throat, and not in a good way. He was far too thin, and bruises marred his skin. Some fresh, from last night, some older. It might have been abuse, but it was impossible to be sure. If Jim was unco-operative, then that might have accounted for the marks. Blair was inclined to believe the worst in this case. Some of those orderlies last night had seemed to be enjoying themselves just a little too much.

Jim lay silent as Blair washed him down. His eyes were barely open and he gave no real sign of recognising Blair but, when Blair began to smooth a soothing gel over his body, he sighed quietly and relaxed. It almost seemed as if he’d grown to expect abuse, or at least rough handling, from his caregivers.

When he finished, Blair sat holding Jim’s lax hand between his own. “Jim, listen to me. Focus on my voice. Can you do that?”

There was no indication that he was getting through. Jim must still be awash with sedatives, on top of whatever they gave him to suppress his senses. It could be days before they were out of his system, after all these years. Somehow Blair would have to convince Al-Bakir to stop the drugs. At the moment, that didn’t seem very likely, but he’d have to try.

“Jim…” Nothing. Not the slightest hint of response. Then Blair remembered that Jim had been the same last night, until Blair had touched him. He took the pale, angular face between his hands, caressing gently, and brushed his lips against Jim’s temple.

A soft moan, almost too quiet for him to hear, greeted his actions. Jim stirred vaguely, his eyelids lifting a little. Blair smiled, but got no response. “Jim, stick with me here, buddy.”

“Blair?” The confusion and disappointment in Jim’s voice was heartbreaking. It seemed almost as if Jim could not register his presence unless they were touching.

“I’m here.” Blair put one hand one Jim’s shoulder, the other on his cheek. “I’m right here, Jim, just look at me.”

But Jim’s eyes, clearly unfocused, drifted past his face without pausing. Blair’s heart began to hammer in his chest. Jim was blind.

***

“Blair, I’m afraid you don’t appreciate the severity of Jimmy’s situation.” Dr Al-Bakir smiled placidly. “He’s been on this medication for nearly ten years. And it’s not as simple as a single drug. Jimmy’s treatment is a complex cocktail of drugs which has taken years of experimentation to develop.”

“But…” Blair bit back his hasty response as the doctor raised his hand, demanding his attention.

“I would be the first to admit that this treatment is far from perfect, but it’s the best we’ve been able to come up with.”

“Jim is _blind_.” Blair leaned forward, eager to get his point across. “Look, I know I’ve only just got here, but I’ve read everything I could find on sentinels. I even read the original Burton manuscript and the late Twentieth Century studies.”

“That’s certainly a promising start.” Al-Bakir smiled. “However the most detailed and in-depth studies undertaken by the Sentinel Institute are not released to the general public, for obvious reasons. You could spend the next ten years studying and you’d still only be at the level that I was when I arrived here fifteen years ago.”

“Maybe, but I have an advantage you don’t.” This, surely, was the clincher… “I’m Jim’s guide. There’s already a connection there. I can reach him when nobody else can.”

The doctor sighed. “I’m sorry, Blair, but I’m afraid that reading those early works has given you a somewhat romanticised view of what a sentinel-guide bond entails.”

“Don’t patronise me.” Blair almost snarled the words. He’d grown used to people underestimating him because of his age and size, but this was too important to let it slide. “I’ve already got further with Jim in one night than all your drugs and crap has done for him in _years_. I can help him.”

“You don’t know that, Blair.” The older man’s expression and voice were unchanged. “We can’t just stop Jimmy’s medication because you _believe_ you can do better. Do you have any idea how dangerous that could be? Not only to Jimmy, but to yourself and anyone who has to deal with him?”

Blair smiled with absolute confidence. “He won’t hurt me. I’m his guide.”

“He’s hurt other guides.” Al-Bakir handed Blair a folder. “After you… left… we tried to find another guide for him. He rejected the prospective guides quite violently. Even under the best circumstances, Jimmy’s inability to control his senses makes him dangerous.”

Blair looked down at the folder without opening it, fighting back his frustration. He couldn’t afford to alienate the doctor, for Jim’s sake, but he knew Al-Bakir was wrong. He _could_ reach Jim. He _would_. A gentle pat on his arm made him look up at the older man.

“I’m sorry. I can’t just give up on him. I can’t.” He forced a smile, tried to look submissive and pleading. He didn’t care what he had to do in order to be with Jim. “Please, just give me a few days. Let me try, and if it doesn’t work, then I’ll do whatever you want.”

He was subjected to a long, considering stare. “All right. I’ll give you three days. But Jimmy will continue to receive his medication.”

Three days! Blair almost objected, but thought better of it. He didn’t know how far he would get in such a short time, but at least it was a reprieve. Something told him he wasn’t likely to get a better offer.

***

By the time he got back to Jim’s room, a nurse had arrived and, with the help of an orderly, was manhandling Jim into the chair he’d been sitting in last night when Blair had arrived. Fighting back the urge to scream abuse at them, Blair hurried to intervene. “It’s all right. I’ll look after him. Dr Al-Bakir’s okayed it.”

“Has he?” The nurse looked doubtful but released Jim’s arm. “You’re going to feed him too?”

“And wipe his ass?” The orderly looked amused. “He’s not easy to deal with.”

“I’ll manage.” Blair didn’t like the look of either of them. He touched Jim’s shoulder lightly and saw him straighten a little. “Come on, buddy.”

He tugged gently and Jim took the two shuffling steps that brought him to the chair. With Blair’s help, he sat, his face turned up even though he clearly saw nothing. Blair stroked a hand across the mop of fine dark hair reassuringly. “See? He’ll be fine. Do you have his food and medication?”

“It’s over here.” The nurse indicated a tray on the bench just inside the door. “Well, there’s plenty more for us to do.”

“Sure. Thanks.” Blair barely noticed them leaving as he bent over Jim. “Time for breakfast, Jim. You hungry?”

It took a long time to feed Jim; in spite of his thinness, the young sentinel seemed to have little appetite. When Blair tasted the food he understood why. It was almost unbearably bland, which came as no great surprise, considering Jim’s condition, but it was also unmistakeably synthetic. How did they expect a sentinel, even one as drugged as Jim was, to eat this crap?

Eventually, he managed to feed most of it to Jim, all the time talking and touching him to reaffirm his own presence to the sentinel. When it was done and he investigated the medicated patch left behind by the nurse, Blair came to a fundamental decision. Instead of replacing the old patch with the new, he placed it over the old patch. Some of the drug would still get through, but it ought to slow down its release into Jim’s system. He would have preferred to simply get rid of both, but there was always the chance that Al-Bakir was right, and that simply stopping the medication would endanger Jim’s life. This way, he could hope to give Jim a chance to improve before anyone found out what was happening. He only had three days to convince the doctor that Jim could be saved.

The rest of the morning was spent in physical therapy, or at least, the limited version of it that Blair was able to provide on his own. He massaged Jim’s hands and feet, and tried to lead him through movements of his arms and legs. And he talked, endlessly. Of course that had never been a problem for Blair, but even he was stretched by this. His voice grew scratchy and weak.

By the time the mid-day meal arrived, Jim seemed a little more responsive, even slurring a few disjointed words from time to time, and Blair was elated. But the sight of the unappetising glob of mush on the tray was enough to set his stomach plunging. “Uh… do you think you could bring us something fresh? Some fruit, maybe?”

“This contains all the nutrients Jimmy will need.” The offended tone would have amused him in any other circumstances.

“But it doesn’t taste good.” Blair smiled winningly. He wasn’t Naomi’s son for nothing. “I mean, would _you_ eat it?”

The corners of her mouth curled up a little. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thanks.” Blair grinned. “Something soft. Easy to chew.”

She came back half an hour later with a plate of fruit, cut into bite-sized pieces, and immediately Jim’s head lifted and his nostrils flared. Blair grabbed a juicy segment of orange and held it to his sentinel’s lips. Jim’s tongue snaked out, tasting and then his head lunged forward and he grabbed at the fruit with lips and teeth. Blair grinned triumphantly at the nurse and she laughed as she left. “Don’t let him bite you.”

It wasn’t such bad advice, actually. Blair had his work cut out for him to get the fruit into Jim’s mouth without getting his fingers nipped until he managed to get Jim to take the pieces into his own hand. Even feeding himself seemed to be something that Jim had been discouraged from doing. Blair sighed and stroked Jim’s cheek while murmuring encouragement.

By the time the fruit was finished, Blair could understand why the orderlies preferred to feed Jim rather than allow him to feed himself. The pale face was sticky with fruit juices and there were splotches of food on his top. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up and then maybe we can go outside for a while. You wanna go outside, Jim?”

“Outside…” Jim’s head lifted and a little frown appeared between his eyebrows. “Blair, don’t. Don’t go.”

“Hey. We’ll both go. It’ll be great.” Blair caught hold of the hands that reached urgently for him. “The sun’s shining and there’s trees and grass. You’ll love it.”

“Don’t leave. Please, Blair. Don’t leave me.” Jim’s voice was shaky and hoarse from lack of use. “Please.”

“I won’t leave you, Jim.” He knelt in front of the agitated sentinel and took his face between both of his hands. His vision blurred and his voice thickened. “I won’t ever leave you again. I promise.”

Jim calmed a little, but the frown remained. “Please.”

“I promise.” Blair kissed him gently on the lips. It was a promise he intended to keep, come what may. “I’m your guide. I’m never gonna leave you. Never.”

Nothing was going to entirely allay Jim’s fears, that much was obvious; but he was docile enough as Blair washed his face and hands and exchanged the dirty top for a clean one. Then Blair took one arm in a firm grip and slipped his free hand around Jim’s waist, gently leading him towards the door. He baulked a little at the sounds echoing down the hallway, though they weren’t overly loud. Blair stopped and let him adjust to the new environment until he thought Jim was ready to continue. Gradually, they made their way to the outside door.

Jim flinched when the warmth of the sunlight hit his face, then smiled nervously. “Outside?”

“Yeah. We’re in the garden.” Blair led him across a small patch of grass to a tree with a bench beneath it. “Let’s just sit and enjoy it, huh?”

They sat, and Jim fell back into the silence that seemed to be natural to him. Blair wondered, angrily, if anybody had taken the time to talk to him, or let him come outside into the fresh air. Judging by the pallor of Jim’s skin, the latter seemed particularly unlikely.

But if Jim wasn’t very talkative, he seemed content enough to listen to Blair’s quiet comments and rambling stories. Blair kept his voice to a low, soothing pitch. It had become obvious that Jim’s hearing was quite erratic. A sound too quiet for him to hear one minute, would cause him to flinch the next.

No wonder that the orderlies had dismissed him as too violent to manage without restraints. It would take time and a lot of observation to be able to effectively deal with Jim’s problems. It was time that Blair was more than prepared to spend, if Dr Al-Bakir would allow him to, but he’d already formed the strong impression that the doctor had no intention of allowing him to continue past the three days of their agreement.

***

By mid-evening, Blair was exhausted, but feeling pleased with Jim’s progress, as small as it was. He managed to cajole real food out of the orderly who came with Jim’s nightly ration of the tasteless mush, and Jim seemed to enjoy the meal almost as much as he had the fruit, with pretty much the same resultant mess. This time Blair simply stripped him off completely and then himself before taking Jim into the tiny bathroom and sharing the shower with him.

Touch was so obviously Jim’s major remaining sense. It never seemed to cause him much trouble, although Blair guessed that it was barely above normal sensitivity. He leaned eagerly into Blair’s hands as Blair soaped and rinsed his body, reaching in turn to touch Blair. It seemed the more intimate the touch, the more he liked it and as a result, Blair was becoming almost painfully aroused.

In the last two days, he’d barely had a moment to himself, and certainly no time to masturbate two or three times a day, as he normally would. It was incredibly tempting to move just a little closer to Jim, to allow his erection to brush against Jim’s thigh. Sooner or later, they would become lovers. As a bonded sentinel-guide pair it was inevitable, and Blair had no objection to it being sooner rather than later. He wasn’t entirely inexperienced; he knew what would happen, and it held no fears for him at all.

Still, he wasn’t sure that right here, right now was the best time for it, so Blair gently disentangled himself from Jim, finished rinsing the suds off both of them and wrapped Jim in a large, soft towel. Slinging another towel around his hips, Blair made short work of patting his sentinel dry and leading him back into the main part of his quarters. He settled Jim into the bed and towelled himself off equally quickly.

Jim turned to him eagerly as Blair slipped between the covers. His skin felt warm and soft against Blair’s as he settled into Blair’s arms, but there was little flesh on that long, rangy body. Blair held him close, and tried to ignore the arousal coursing through his veins as once again Jim’s hands began to wander. Every time one of them moved too low, Blair would interrupt his own more decorous stroking of Jim’s back and shoulders to capture it and draw it back up to his chest.

Jim sighed, sending a warm puff of breath against his nipple, and Blair shivered. How long could Jim keep this up? The answer, it seemed, was indefinitely. He was showing no sign of falling asleep, or of losing interest in exploring his guide. He nuzzled Blair’s chest lazily, making quiet, contented sounds and Blair didn’t have the heart to put a stop to it. Jim had existed in a sensual desert for ten long years. This must seem like heaven to a sense-deprived sentinel.

It was beginning to seem like hell to _him_. Eventually, when Jim’s hand once again strayed over his belly, Blair allowed him to continue. His heart was pounding, his cock felt like it was going to explode. He’d never been so intensely aroused in his life. Jim’s first casual touch on his cock startled a whimper out of him and his cock twitched painfully. Curious fingers mapped the contours and Blair endured it with gritted teeth, trying to hold on, trying not to thrust against a touch that was merely inquisitive, not sexual. It was an impossible task. As Jim’s fingers drifted up the length of his shaft and over his cockhead, the orgasm exploded out of him and Blair sobbed in mingled anguish and relief.

The rush was so powerful Blair almost blacked out. He floated in a sensual daze for a while, and came back to earth with a bang at the realisation that Jim was coating his fingers with cum and then licking them clean again. It felt wrong, somehow, even though it was inevitable that a sentinel would enjoy the most intimate tastes of his guide’s body. Perhaps it was because Jim was still so obviously unaroused, that it seemed wrong.

“Jim?” He whispered the name into Jim’s hair, “Jim, would you like me to touch you?”

A barely audible “Blair” seemed to convey agreement, and Blair began slowly to extend his own caresses, down over Jim’s back to his hip and thigh; then up again to the still soft genitals. A contented hum indicated that Jim was happy with his touch, but there was no change in the lax cock. Blair continued gently stroking until Jim sighed and snuggled his face into the base of Blair’s throat. Moments later the slow, steady breathing told Blair that Jim had fallen asleep.

He settled the covers around them more comfortably and closed his eyes, but it was a long time before he slept. 

***

Blair watched anxiously as Dr Al-Bakir examined Jim. The sentinel was balky, inclined to object to any unexpected touch, much to Blair’s growing dismay. Jim had improved so much in the three days they’d had together, but there was no sign of that now. Finally, Jim shoved the doctor away roughly with a growled protest and Blair moved to intervene.

“I’m sorry. He’s still kinda leery with other people. He’s much better with me.” Blair laid a hand on Jim’s bare shoulder and the sentinel leaned into his side. The complete trust Jim showed him was humbling. “It’s only been three days. You can’t expect much improvement with those drugs screwing with his senses.”

“I agree, there’s improvement.” Al-Bakir sighed deeply. “But, Blair, Jimmy is far from being able to function normally, and I’m just not willing to risk that he won’t respond aggressively to the staff and students here.”

“Then let us stay in one of the guest houses.” It was so hard to keep his voice even, but if Jim picked up on the tension he was trying so hard to suppress, anything could happen. “He’s fine with me, and if I could just wean him off the drugs…”

“No. Absolutely not.” The sharp response drew another growl from Jim and Al-Bakir frowned. “Blair, there’s no monitoring equipment in the guest houses, and for your own safety, we can’t allow you to be completely unsupervised. Besides…” a troubled glance at Jim warned Blair that he wasn’t going to like what came next. “I don’t… the medical committee doesn’t feel that the likelihood of any minor improvement would justify the time and effort it would take. As I told you, there are a lot of things you could do here that would be of real value, and…”

“And none of you care what happens to Jim. You’re all willing to let him rot.” Blair interrupted bitterly; then had to soothe Jim with a quick caress down his back. He glared at the doctor.

“I’m sorry you feel that way, Blair.” He actually looked hurt. “I’ve known Jimmy since he was eight years old. Putting him on this medication was one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever made, but he was becoming increasingly dangerous to himself and to others. You haven’t seen what he’s capable of. I have to think of everyone’s safety, including yours, and his.”

Tears blurred his vision as Blair realised that this was the end. Al-Bakir simply wasn’t going to listen and arguing would only upset Jim and make everything worse. He took a moment to get his voice under control before trying to speak. “All right. I’ll do what you want, but only if I get to stay with Jim at night, and work with him every day. I’ll help the other sentinels and guides, but I won’t pair off with another sentinel. Jim’s my sentinel.”

The doctor nodded reluctantly. “I’ll make the arrangements. You’ll have your own room and Jimmy can be brought there in the evening. During the day he’ll be in his current quarters.”

It was the best he could hope for, but it brought no sense of victory. Ignoring Dr Al-Bakir, Blair helped Jim put on his loose cotton top and led him from the examining room.

***

At two o’clock, Blair slipped out of Jim’s narrow bed and dressed silently. Al-Bakir’s decision, while a painful blow, hadn’t been entirely unexpected. From that first day, Blair had been making plans, and hoping desperately he wouldn’t need to use them. From the small backpack he’d brought with him, he took the clothing he’d managed to acquire – clothing that would be a reasonable fit for Jim and replace the all too obviously institutional pants and top he habitually wore.

Jim, though sleepy, was hard-wired to follow his guide’s instructions, and was no trouble to dress. Blair let him wear the slippers that he was used to, knowing that shoes would probably cause him discomfort and slow him down. When he was ready, Blair led him out into the hallway.

This time of night the hallways were deserted and the lights dimmed. Unless they were extremely unlucky, they would be able to get to their goal without being seen. After that… well, there was only so much Blair could scout out in advance without arousing suspicion. He’d just have to hope for the best. The gamble was enormous, and terrifying, but there wasn’t much of a choice any more.

“Jim, tell me if you hear anyone coming, okay?” Blair had discovered that although Jim spoke rarely and only used a few dozen words, he seemed to understand most of what Blair said to him. Now, he grunted in reply. A sound Blair had come to recognise as assent. “Good. We’re going to go for a ride. You’ll like that, buddy. We’ll go somewhere we can always be together.”

“Outside?” Jim stopped, his face crumpling. In spite of the fact that Blair had been taking him out to sit in the sun, Jim always became anxious at the prospect, though he seemed to enjoy the experience.

“I’m not gonna leave you, Jim. Not ever.” Blair tugged at his arm gently and the sentinel came along with him. “We’re both gonna go stay with my friends. You’re coming too. You’re my sentinel, remember?”

“Guide. My guide.” Contentment warmed Jim’s voice. “Together.”

“Together. That’s right.” They’d reached the end of the hallway. The storage area was to the right, and beyond that the maintenance area, where the small hovercars that were used for travel to Cascade or other nearby towns were repaired. There was one there now, Blair knew, which was waiting for its six monthly check to be completed. He’d heard the techs complaining about being too busy to carry out some minor repairs that were required before it could be certified. “We have to be quiet now.”

Guiding Jim toward the warehouse doors was easy enough. If his verbal abilities hadn’t improved much in the last few days, his motor skills certainly had. Blair suspected that, given a little encouragement to move about, Jim had instinctively started to use his other senses to compensate for the lack of sight. His hearing had become more reliable, and his sense of smell was improved, if still not at sentinel level.

He released Jim long enough to key in the code to open the door to the storage area. The security in this place was a joke; he’d watched one of the orderlies open the door and memorised the numbers. She hadn’t even tried to prevent him seeing them. Not that he was complaining…

The storage room was enormous, with high metal shelving, and the echoes of their footsteps were obviously confusing and alarming Jim. Blair stopped for a moment and wrapped his arms around Jim. Under his cheek, Jim’s heartbeat was hard and much too fast. “It’s okay. Just trust me, Jim. I’ll always look after you.”

“Blair.” Jim rubbed his face against the top of Blair’s head and inhaled deeply. It seemed to comfort him, and Blair released him.

“We’re nearly there.” He took Jim’s arm again.

The door leading through to the maintenance area wasn’t even locked. Heaving a tiny sigh of relief, Blair slipped through, and then Jim. This had been one of the things he hadn’t been able to find out in advance. He’d only hoped that the same code opened all the doors in this area. Now all they had to do was find the hovercar among all the machinery that was awaiting repair.

But a few metres inside the room, Jim stopped, his head lifting, listening. “Blair.”

“Someone’s coming?” Jim grunted an affirmative. Shit! “Over here. Don’t make a sound.” He backed them both into a narrow alley between two large machines. Surely the shadows here would be enough to hide them.

It should have been enough, but it wasn’t. Blair saw the light from the security guard’s torch moving across the exit from their hiding place, then it stopped. A muffled curse seemed loud in the otherwise silent room, as the guard crouched to look at something on the floor. Blair couldn’t see what it was. Then the guard straightened and moved towards them.

There was nowhere to run; they were only a few metres from a wall, and the guard was blocking their only escape route. He was reaching for his communicator. Blair stepped out of the shadows into the edge of the light.

“Hey.” He felt Jim behind him, shuffling nervously. “Didn’t expect to see anyone here. We just wanted a little privacy, you know?”

“Sorry, kid, you picked the wrong night.” The guard sounded more amused than alarmed. “I’m gonna have to report you.”

“No!” Blair spoke too sharply and Jim growled. The guard’s eyes narrowed. Blair mustered his most charming smile. “Aw, come on, man. Give us a break here.”

The guard shook his head. “Regulations. Sorry.” His hand resumed its course toward the communicator.

“Jim, he’s gonna take you away from me.” Blair muttered the words quickly, his heart pounding. He’d been told Jim could be violent. It looked like now was the time to find out just how violent he could be.

“No.” The low growl startled both Blair and the guard, and then Blair was brushed aside as Jim lunged for the older, heavier man.

The guard never stood a chance. Blair flinched at the sound of thwack after meaty thwack as Jim attacked. It was only a moment before Blair gathered the presence of mind to pull Jim away, but he caught a glimpse of the guard’s bloodied face as the other man crumpled to the floor. Close to panic, and sickened to the depths of his soul by what he’d unleashed, he pulled at Jim’s arm again. “We have to get out of here.”

He picked up the torch from the floor and the taser out of the guard’s belt. They might come in useful if anyone else found them. Blair didn’t think he could sic Jim onto another man after seeing what he’d just done. It had been quick and brutal, and now Jim was standing placidly beside him, waiting to be told what to do next. Blair shivered.

At least the light helped them find the hovercar. Even better, there was a dirty coverall hanging on a hook nearby. Blair pulled it on hastily. It would help get them past the security guard at the main gate. “Jim, I want you to lie down on the floor in the back, okay? I’ll put a blanket over you, and you can’t move or make a sound.”

Jim grunted again, and allowed Blair to get him into position. Blair kissed his forehead before he covered him. “It won’t be long, I promise.”

The controls of the hovercar were similar to others he’d driven, and Blair easily started it up and turned it towards the outside door. It opened automatically, since nobody expected a thief to break out of the area. Blair’s heart was pounding, his hands sweaty. Soon, soon they’d be away from this place and nobody else, _please_ , was going to get hurt.

He drove carefully towards the gate and slowed to a stop by the guard booth. It was almost three o’clock and the guard was both sleepy and bored. He readily accepted Blair’s tale of a late flight into Cascade and a breakdown in the middle of nowhere that had resulted in him being called out to either fix the problem or ferry the unlucky staff member back to the Institute. It was the last obstacle, and Blair had to resist the urge to use maximum acceleration as he drove past the opened gate.

***

Dawn was nearly breaking when they stopped at the edge of a forested area. Jim had been sleeping, but Blair was exhausted, and there was still a long way to go. But Naomi was waiting for them with another hovercar, and that was enough to lift Blair’s spirits. He’d passed a message to one of her many friends, but there had always been the possibility that they wouldn’t have been able to contact her.

“Sweetie, you look terrible.” She opened her arms, but Blair hesitated, unsure of how Jim would react. After a moment she let her arms drop. “And this is Jim.”

“Yeah. He’s not… he’s not real good right now.” Blair chose his words carefully, afraid suddenly, of unleashing the violence that Jim had exhibited earlier. “Mom, we need to go somewhere safe.”

“Of course you do.” She was watching Jim, her eyes assessing him critically. She smiled at Blair, but the worried expression didn’t leave her face. “I’ve made the arrangements. The course is entered into the autopilot. Just get out when it stops, but don’t switch off. The car’s programmed to continue its journey after you get out. Someone will meet you at the drop-off co-ordinates.”

“You did all that?” Blair smiled, impressed that his sometimes capricious mother could be so well organised.

Naomi laughed softly. “Of course not, sweetie. I have a friend who understands these things.”

Of course. Naomi always had a friend. Blair moved forward and hugged his mother at last. Who knew when they would meet again? He sniffed and blinked back tears. “Thanks, Mom. It could be a while before…”

“Blair, I understand.” She cupped his cheek. “I think I’ll probably go out of the country for a while. Maybe Nepal. Jonathon will know how to contact me. I promise I’ll keep in touch with him. If you need anything, just call him.”

“Okay.” Jonathon was the closest thing to a father he’d known, the one man Naomi had returned to over and over again, never losing contact with him as she had with most of her other lovers. “We’d better go. I don’t know how long it’ll be before they find out…”

“Go on.” Naomi hugged him again. “I’ll take your car a little further and then dump it. I have a friend waiting to pick me up.”

“Bye, Mom. I love you.” He kissed her soft cheek.

“I love you too, baby.” She walked past him to Jim and stopped. “Jim, you’ll take care of him, won’t you?”

To Blair’s astonishment, Jim lifted a hand to touch her cheek, fumbling a little. “Mommy. Blair’s mommy.”

“Yes.” Naomi’s voice was tearful. “So you remember?”

“Outside. Blair.” There was pain in Jim’s voice. “Blair gone.”

“Not this time, Jim.” Blair moved to stand beside them, torn between fear for his mother, if Jim should decide she was a danger to them, and the instinctive need to protect and comfort his sentinel. “This time you come with me, okay?”

Jim nodded, but there were tears on his cheeks. Naomi leaned up on tiptoe to kiss him gently. “You let him go, because you loved him, but now he’s come back to you. Thank you for giving me those years with my son.”

“Mom…” Blair hugged them both, awkwardly because of the differences in their heights, but needing to hold the two people he loved most in the world. It could be the only time he had this chance.

When Naomi slipped away, he retained his hold on Jim, burying his face against Jim’s chest until the whine of the hovercar faded into the distance.   

***

“You’ll be safe here, Blair, Jim.” Thomas Whitehorn led them down a couple of steps to the entrance of the small cabin. It was partially sunk into the ground, with a turf roof and tiny windows. “The roof’s been insulated to cut down heat signals and it’s completely self-contained. It was set up about seventy years back, when conscientious objectors were coming through here on the way to Canada.” The old man grinned, his teeth gleaming in the dim light under the trees. “Of course that wouldn’t do a lot of good any more.”

It had been a stroke of genius for Naomi to arrange this. They’d stayed at this reservation a whole summer when he’d been ten, and he’d loved the old man, the father of Naomi’s lover at the time. Like most Native American reservations these days in the Confederation of North American States, it was virtually an autonomous state and it would be difficult for the Institute to have them arrested on reservation land. All the same, he was glad that this cabin existed.

“It’ll be great.” Beside him, Jim was quiet, tired no doubt. Blair was beyond tired now, running on adrenaline and sheer necessity. “We really need to rest right now, but I’m gonna need to talk to your healers about Jim. Did Naomi tell you?”

Thomas nodded. “I’ll get Mary and Nathaniel to come see you tomorrow morning.” He pushed the door open and stood back. “There’s food and water in there. Everything you’ll need for a day or two, and we can bring more later.”

Blair looked around the tiny room, there was a decent sized bed, a tiny shower and toilet in a small alcove and a sink and counter for preparing food. It was extremely utilitarian, but homely too, with woven hangings and blankets, and a braided rug on the floor.

He steered Jim towards the bed, longing to drop into it himself and lose himself in oblivion. But first he mustered what energy he could and smiled up at the old man, still standing just inside the doorway. “Thanks, _chope_.”

A delighted smile crossed Thomas’ face. “You haven’t forgotten.”

Grandfather. It was one of the few Chinook words Blair still remembered from those days. “Mostly, I have. But I remember that.”

A hand patted the top of his head gently, and Blair blinked. He hadn’t seen Thomas cross the floor – must have blanked out for a moment. “You need to sleep, child. You and your sentinel.”

“ _Eyeh_.” He raised a tired smile and didn’t protest when gentle hands pushed him down beside Jim, lifted his feet onto the bed and dropped a light blanket over them both. He didn’t even hear the door shut.

***

They slept the night through, though it had only been late afternoon when they’d arrived, and woke with the sound of birds greeting the new day outside the cabin. Blair staggered out of bed and used the facilities with a grateful sigh, then helped Jim to do the same. He sniffed. A shower was definitely in order, but he was too hungry to wait for breakfast.

The basket of food on the counter proved to be full of tasty delights – fruit preserves and eggs and a dense wholegrain loaf that brought back memories from that long ago summer. There were strips of beef jerky, too, and small jars of honey and coffee, and in a small chiller, milk and yoghurt, orange juice and drinking water. With the freeze dried packs of vegetable and meat casseroles, there was more than enough to last them several days.

Orange juice and thick slices of bread smeared with preserves took care of their immediate hunger, and then it was time for a shower. Jim had already become accustomed to their morning routine and even the disruption of yesterday didn’t seem to have caused any problems for him. As he soaped Jim down, Blair found himself staring at the medicinal patch on Jim’s chest.

There were no more, and soon the patch would lose its effectiveness. Until yesterday, Blair had been sure that he could help Jim through what was likely to be a difficult withdrawal from the drugs. But until yesterday he’d had no experience of just how violent Jim could be. He could still hear the sickening sounds as Jim beat the security guard into unconsciousness with just a few blows. He was responsible for a man being, at best, seriously injured, possibly killed. He wasn’t the same person he’d been two days ago.

Taking a deep breath, Blair peeled the patch off Jim’s wet skin. Whatever was going to happen, there was no going back now. Because of him, Jim would face permanent incarceration in a psych ward if they were captured – unless he could prove that Jim was recovered, a fully functional sentinel.

He knew Jim would never willingly hurt him. The danger lay in Jim becoming so disoriented, or losing enough control of his senses, that he could no longer recognise Blair. Although that seemed unlikely, it wouldn’t hurt to spend as much time as possible imprinting himself on Jim’s senses. So Blair prolonged the shower until the water began to cool, pressing close to Jim, sliding his hands over the water-slick skin and murmuring encouragement under his breath. Jim leaned into his touch, eager, as always, for any contact with his guide, making contented sounds and touching Blair in return.

After patting Jim dry, Blair encouraged him to lie on the bed and began to smooth the creamy lotion that he’d brought from the Institute into Jim’s skin. It was something that Jim obviously loved, and his once dry skin was already greatly improved by the twice-daily massage. Blair thought he could even detect a small improvement in the muscle tone of Jim’s arms and legs. The only thing that disturbed him was the continued lack of physical response – not even direct stimulation of Jim’s cock was enough to produce more than a slight swelling of the shaft.

Of course, the opposite applied to him. Just touching Jim so intimately was enough to get him hard, and Blair had had to accept this, despite his reservations. He couldn’t prevent it from happening, and he couldn’t hide it from Jim. So, after the massage was finished, he lay down beside Jim and allowed his sentinel to explore his body with every sense Jim could still use. By the time Jim reached his cock, Blair was ready to explode. He moaned helplessly and let the waves of pleasure crash over him, then pulled Jim into his arms.

They spent most of the day like that, with Jim curled around him, listening to Blair telling stories of the summer he spent on the reservation. Occasionally they left the bed to eat, or use the toilet, and once they went outside still naked, just to feel the cool, fresh air on their skins. Jim was in heaven. Blair would have been too, if it hadn’t been for the tickling sensation of fear in the pit of his belly.

As evening fell, Blair coaxed Jim into the spare set of clothes, which was all they had clean. Soon Thomas would arrive, with the two healers. Blair could only hope, against all hope, that there was something they could do to help Jim as the drugs wore off and he had to deal with his unruly senses.

Mary, he remembered from his summer on the reservation, but Nathaniel was a stranger, and a lot younger than he’d expected. Even more surprising, he was carrying a medical kit that proved to be very modern. The young man caught Blair’s expression and grinned.

“I trained at medical school, but that doesn’t mean I don’t respect the old traditions.” He nodded towards the elderly woman at his side. “Mary’s taught me far more than I ever learned at college.”

Mary chuckled and patted Blair’s cheek. “The boy teaches me too, but I don’t let him know that.”

“Do you think you can help Jim?” Blair watched anxiously as Mary went over to where Jim was sitting on the edge of the bed. The sentinel didn’t flinch when Mary touched his shoulder gently, leaning over him as she murmured reassuringly in her own language.

Her examination methods were as strange as he remembered. She sniffed at Jim’s neck and mouth, gently pinched his skin and rubbed a strand of hair between her fingers. Surprisingly, Jim smiled at her as she drew back, and lifted his hand to touch her cheek. The old woman smiled and squeezed his hand for a moment before moving away.

She nodded to Nathaniel and he lifted his scanner, placing it against Jim’s chest, frowning a little at the display. Then he took a small laser out of his kit. “Jim, I’m going to shine a light into your eyes. Don’t be alarmed if you see something.”

Taking Jim’s grunt as assent, he shone the light into Jim’s eyes, flicking it away and back several times. Then, after warning Jim again, he took a small blood sample and tucked it away in the kit. At each step he quietly advised Jim what he was doing, and once again, Jim accepted his attentions with little sign of concern.

When the examination was over, he nodded at Blair and moved away from Jim a little. He and Mary talked quietly in their own language, too quietly and too fast for him to pick out even the occasional word. Thomas patted his shoulder reassuringly and then sat on the edge of the bed beside Jim. He took Jim’s hand between his own wrinkled ones, stoking it gently.

“Blair.” Nathaniel beckoned Blair over. With a glance at Jim, Blair went. “Don’t look so worried, Blair. He’s really in better condition that I would have expected.”

“His spirit is strong.” Mary nodded, “but there is a darkness which surrounds him. His body and spirit must be cleansed. It will not be easy for either of you, but your spirit will aid the healing in him.”

Blair smiled shakily, more relieved than he could say. “What about his sight? Will he see again?”

“His pupils respond to light.” Nathaniel shrugged, “so there’s no physical damage. But there’s no telling what the drugs have done. I’d assume they were psychotropic in nature, designed to suppress the areas of the brain that process sensory input. We won’t know what residual damage might remain until the drug’s out of his system.”

“What can I do?”

“The best thing you can do is to stay with him.” Nathaniel smiled reassuringly and Mary nodded her agreement. “He’s completely focused on you. He’ll rely on you to anchor him. There’ll be a range of physical reactions as he goes through withdrawal – sweating, cramps, nausea, disorientation – just stay close to him, make sure he’s aware of your presence.”

“I’ll leave you some herbs to ease his pain and soothe his spirit.” Mary patted his arm. “You will keep him quiet and calm. The rest is up to the ancestors.”

It seemed pitifully inadequate. Blair looked desperately from Nathaniel to Mary and back. “Isn’t there anything else? Something… stronger?”

“Blair, we don’t know what drugs he’s been given. His system is hopelessly compromised.” Nathaniel gave him a sympathetic look. “It would be reckless to put any more drugs into his system. I simply don’t know how he would react to them.”

“There is great strength in both of you.” Mary nodded and smiled. “Have faith in him, as his faith is in you. Can you not see it?”

He looked at Jim, sitting quietly on the edge of the bed, listening to them, though it was doubtful he understood much of what had been said. From the moment he’d returned to Jim, his sentinel had accepted him totally, in spite of the years of mistreatment that should have made him wary. Jim had recognised immediately that they belonged together, now Blair had to believe it as unquestioningly as Jim did.

“Yes. I belong to him and he belongs to me.” Blair felt a weight slip from his shoulders. He would do this because he had to, because the alternative was… no alternative at all. He kissed Mary’s wrinkled cheek. “Thank you.”

She nodded once, in satisfaction. “We will be close. If you need us, just call.  But it would be better if you can tend to Jim yourself. It is not good to come between a sentinel and his guide.”

***

After they left, Blair made Jim a mug of tea, using the herbs Mary had told him would help Jim to sleep. He drank a small amount himself, thinking that it would help soothe his nerves, hopefully without making him sleep too deeply. Then he led Jim to the shower, and after a quick wash they lay down. Jim immediately curled up against his side and they were both asleep within minutes.

Twice during the night, Jim’s restless movements woke him. The first time it was relatively easy to calm him by rubbing his back and talking quietly to him. Soon Jim’s head was resting heavily on his shoulder, and his arm around Blair’s waist.

Next time, it wasn’t so easy. When soft-spoken words and gentle stroking couldn’t ease Jim’s distress, Blair levered himself out of bed and brewed another mug of the tea. He had to coax Jim into drinking the slightly bitter brew, but after a while it took effect and Blair crawled back into bed. It was a lot longer, that time, before he slept again.

Morning only brought confirmation that Jim was already in withdrawal from the drugs. One minute he would be hot and panting, the next shivering miserably while soaked in sweat. Blair could still reach him, but with more of an effort, and several times he had to physically restrain Jim from tearing at his skin. All Jim’s senses, except for sight, were spiking randomly before dropping to almost nothing. Worse, he knew very well that Jim could easily have overpowered him. Only the sentinel’s ingrained sense of protectiveness for his guide made it possible for Blair to control him at all. What might happen if Jim became too disoriented to respond to him was a frightening thought that haunted all Blair’s waking moments.

In between bouts of hyper-sensitivity, Blair managed to wash Jim down, or get a tiny, precious amount of fluid into him. Sometimes the remission lasted long enough for Blair to lie beside Jim, holding him close and dozing fitfully whenever he got the chance. Sometimes it seemed that he was losing all ability to control Jim and more than once he was tempted to activate the tiny beacon that would bring Nathaniel, Thomas, or Mary to his aid. It was only the memory of Mary’s words that prevented him from doing it. Jim had already suffered enough because of their separation. He wouldn’t risk Jim’s hope of recovery by bringing anyone else between them at such a critical point.

He lost track of time, but surely they must have weathered at least a couple of days and nights, before Jim’s symptoms began to ease and the exhausted sentinel dropped into longer periods of uneasy sleep. Blair sighed in relief and stretched out beside him.

When he woke again, Jim was sleeping much more peacefully. He showered quickly and wiped Jim down with a damp cloth. When Jim woke, he wouldn’t want to feel the sticky sweat clinging to his skin. As Jim slept on, Blair made himself coffee and scrambled some eggs, eating them hastily with one eye on the bed. But he’d finished his breakfast and cleaned up the cooking utensils, and his plate and mug, before Jim showed any signs of waking.

“Jim?” He stroked back a damp, greasy strand of hair from Jim’s forehead. “Jim, it’s Blair. I’m right here.”

Jim’s dark lashes fluttered, a tiny frown appeared between his brows and his lips parted soundlessly. Blair dipped his finger in a mug of water and wiped a few drops across the dry lips. Jim’s tongue crept out and gathered the moisture in. His eyes opened just a fraction. “Blair?”

“Yeah, it’s me.” Blair almost sobbed in relief. He patted Jim’s cheek gently. “Everything’s gonna be okay, Jim. I’ve got some water here. You want a drink?”

“Please.” It was little more than a hoarse whisper. Jim frowned again, his eyes opening, and Blair knew immediately that he was still blind. The unfocused stare swept right past him without pausing. “It’s dark.”

Oh, Jim… he fought back the almost crushing sense of disappointment and pity. “It’s all right, Jim. I’m here.” He slid an arm under Jim’s shoulder for support and held the mug to Jim’s lips. “Drink slowly, okay?”

A few sips were all that Jim took before sinking down again. “Blair? Are you really here? It’s not a dream?”

“No. It’s not a dream, I promise.” He kissed Jim’s parted lips, immeasurably relieved, at least, by the already obvious improvement in Jim’s speech. He hadn’t been capable of speaking in whole sentences before. “You’ve been sick, but you’re better now, and we’re together.”

“Okay.” Jim’s easy confidence in him was evident as his eyes closed and he relaxed again into sleep.

***

When they woke again, Blair thought it must be early morning, judging by the noise the birds were making in the distance. He turned immediately to Jim and found that his sentinel was already awake.

“Hey.” Without thinking, he kissed Jim’s lips, and then drew back at Jim’s obvious surprise. “Sorry. I guess I shouldn’t have done that.”

“You don’t sound like a little kid.” Jim’s brows drew together again.

Oh. Of course, Jim would remember him only as a three-year-old. “I’m not. You’ve been… kinda out of it for a while.”

While Blair was wondering how to break it to Jim that he’d been a virtual zombie for the last ten years, Jim reached out to touch his cheek. He didn’t have to shave much, as yet, but there was no mistaking the stubble on his jaw.

“How old _are_ you?” Jim’s voice was hushed, as though he was afraid of the answer. “How old am I?”

“It’s been a long time, Jim.” Blair stroked his hand up and down Jim’s arm. “I’m sixteen.”

“Then I’m…” Jim hesitated, but not, Blair thought, because the math was beyond him. “Why is it so dark? I should be able to see.”

“It’s complicated.” Responding to the growing distress of his sentinel, Blair moved closer, sliding one arm around Jim, trying to radiate calm and reassurance. Inside he was almost sick with apprehension at what he was going to have to tell Jim. “You were given drugs, and they’ve screwed up your senses. But they’ll come back. I’m sure they will.”

Jim gasped suddenly, and before he knew what was happening, Jim was in his arms shaking and sobbing. He hung on as best he could, murmuring reassurances until Jim lay limp with exhaustion against his side. He fell into a light doze soon after that, much to Blair’s relief.

By the time Jim woke again, Blair had got dressed and prepared a light meal for them both, along with more of Mary’s tea. He figured Jim was going to need all the calming influence Blair could offer.

It was obvious that Jim’s motor control was as much improved as his speech. He managed the bread and honey, and the mug of warm tea, with a great deal more confidence and a lot less mess that he’d ever achieved at the Institute. Afterwards, Blair encouraged him to lean back against a pile of cushions and relax for a while.

Then it was time to face their demons. “Okay, Jim. Do you remember the classes back at the Institute, when you learned how to visualise the controls for your senses?”

“Of course I do.” Jim’s impatience was understandable. These were the most basic lessons for a sentinel.

“Good. I want you to check your levels, one at a time, as I guide you. Don’t change anything, just check and tell me where they are.” Blair jammed his fingernails into his palms, fighting to keep the nervousness out of his voice. “Start with touch, okay?”

Jim nodded, his face slackening a little as he reached inside himself. Touch had appeared to be his strongest sense, back at the Institute. He relaxed a little. “Six.”

“That’s great.” Blair grinned in relief. A little higher than normal, but that was fine. “How about hearing?”

“Um… three.”

“Okay. Can you bring that up – slowly – to a four. Just hold it there.” Blair watched a little anxiously as Jim complied, finally releasing his breath when Jim nodded. “Good. No problems?” Jim shook his head. “You’re doing great. Where’s smell?”

It took a little longer before Jim announced that it was at two. Blair laughed. “Yeah, well neither of us is any too fresh right now. Maybe you’d better just leave it there.”

Jim giggled. _Giggled_. It was an incongruously childish sound, coming from a physically mature man. “Okay. What’s next?”

Blair took a deep breath to centre himself. He couldn’t bear to put this off any longer. “Jim, where’s sight at?”

The wait this time seemed to last an eternity. Jim’s breathing suddenly became shaky and Blair reached for him. “What is it? Jim, tell me!”

“I can’t… there’s nothing there.” When Blair’s fingers gripped his arm tightly, Jim flinched.

“It’s set to zero?” That wasn’t good. The young sentinels were trained never to lower their levels all the way. But Jim must have been advanced enough in his training by, age thirteen, to be able to recover from that. “Can you bring it up a little?”

“No.” Jim shook his head, his distress rapidly increasing. “It’s not zero. There’s no levels at all. There isn’t anything. Blair…”

But Blair was already there, pulling Jim into his arms, fighting his own panic to reassure his sentinel. This was worse than anything he’d imagined.

***

“I honestly don’t know, Blair.” Nathaniel shook his head resignedly. “If I had any idea what the drugs were… but then I’d have to know how they interacted, and probably the only people who could give me the information are the doctors at the Institute. All I can tell you is what I said before. The problem isn’t physical in nature, at least as far as Jim’s eyes are concerned. It could be psychological, it could be trauma to the brain brought on by the drugs.”

“So this is it?” Blair cast a worried glance over at Jim. “He’s always going to be blind?”

“Not necessarily. The effects of the drugs could last for days, even weeks or months, if they’ve built up in his system.” Nathaniel shrugged. “And, frankly, it’s hard to predict anything when a sentinel’s involved. They tend to have very idiosyncratic drug reactions, and the Institute keeps most of its research under wraps.”

“Yeah, to keep them under its control.” Blair smiled bitterly. “If they find us…”

“They won’t.” Nathaniel patted his shoulder reassuringly. “Try not to worry too much. It won’t help Jim, or you. He’s going to rely on you, emotionally as well as physically. Help him to get his other senses under control and don’t give up hope, okay?”

“Okay.” Already, he felt he’d been ignoring Jim for too long. He wanted to get back to his sentinel. “Thanks, Nathaniel.”

“Call any time.” Nathaniel smiled as he slipped out the open door, closing it gently behind him.

Blair went over to the bed, where Jim was lying in a bundle of crumpled sheets and blankets. “You hear that?”

“Yeah.” Jim sounded distinctly tearful and very vulnerable. “I’m sorry, Blair. You don’t want a sentinel like me.”

“Who says I don’t?” Blair sat down beside him. “We belong together, that’s all there is to it. Anyway, you’re already way better than you were. You’re gonna keep on getting better.” He took Jim’s hand between his own. “It’s gonna be all right.”

A sniff was his only answer. He lay down and immediately Jim snuggled into his arms. It made him aware, once again, of the vast difference between Jim’s physical development and his psychological development. He stroked Jim’s hair silently for a while.

“Hey, Jim?” When Jim didn’t answer, he squeezed a little. “Do you want me to call you Jimmy? I guess that’s what you’re used to, huh?”

A quiet sigh gusted across his chest, infiltrating the thin T-shirt and warming his skin. “No. Jim’s fine. I guess I’m not a kid any more.”

“You sure aren’t.” There was more warmth in Blair’s voice than was tactful and he found himself blushing. Now that the reality of Jim’s situation was sinking in, he could no more imagine coming on to Jim than he would a real thirteen-year-old. It didn’t change the way he reacted to Jim’s body and looks, though. “Sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“Sure you did.” Jim didn’t sound like he was bothered. “For crying out loud, Blair, all the kids my age were making out with their guides, when I… when I was normal.”

He doubted that ‘making out’ covered the kinds of things he’d like to be able to do with Jim. “That’s different. I’d feel like I was taking advantage somehow.”

Jim laughed softly. “You’re my guide. You wouldn’t do that.” He lifted his head a little. “You kissed me before.”

“Yeah. I did.” Blair felt suddenly breathless. Jim was a mixture of shy innocence and pubescent randiness, all packaged together in the body of a grown man. A man so beautiful he made Blair’s body ache. “Was that okay?”

A mischievous smile brightened Jim’s face. “Sure it was. Can I kiss _you_ now?”

“If… if you want to.” Blair’s mouth was dry. He watched as Jim’s face got closer, and had to guide him the last few inches so their lips met. It was a chaste, tentative kiss, but Jim moaned eagerly. “You like that?”

“Yeah.” Jim kissed him again, with more enthusiasm than skill, and Blair drew back.

“Here. Like this…” Blair barely brushed his lips across Jim’s, then pressed close, using his tongue to gently part Jim’s lips. He sucked a little on the lower lip and kissed him again. So good… his body melted, fitting itself bonelessly against the angles of Jim’s body.

If there was one thing a sentinel ought to be good at, it was learning to kiss, and Jim was very good. They lay entwined throughout the long afternoon, lazily kissing until their lips were swollen and aching. Since Jim showed little inclination to explore further, Blair contented himself with that, ignoring the ache that was located considerably lower down his body.

Of course, it was impossible to ignore forever. Eventually, Blair was forced to excuse himself. He hurried outside, still wearing only his T-shirt and boxers, then ran until he thought he was far enough away from the cabin. His balls were aching fiercely as he shoved his boxers down and took his cock in an urgent grip.

He managed to suppress the cry that rose to his lips at that first touch and began to jerk himself off. It was sheer torture at first, needing to come so badly, but then the rush started and his hips began to thrust erratically, driving his cock through fingers slippery with pre-cum. Jim… oh god, Jim… His body arched, head thrown back, hips pushing forward eagerly, and the knot in his gut twisted then suddenly loosened. Long spurts of cum exploded from his cock, scattering across the ground then, as the spasms eased, dribbling over his fingers. With a low moan, Blair leaned against the nearest tree, gasping for breath.

***

“Just one more. Come on, Jim, you can do it.” Blair made an effort to inject as much enthusiasm as he could into his voice, since Jim couldn’t see the approval in his face. “That’s _great_ , Jim. Four more than yesterday.” He patted a sweaty thigh as Jim relaxed back from his body curl. “Take a breather, then we’ll walk a bit while you cool down.”

“That’s easy for you to say.” But Jim grinned, obviously pleased with himself. After a couple of deep breaths he sat up and Blair grabbed his outstretched hand to help him to his feet. “Whoah…”

Jim wavered a little on his feet and clutched at Blair, but it was just a game – and an excuse to manhandle his guide. “Hey, keep your hands off the coach, eh Jim? C’mon, let’s walk.”

They made a few circuits of the room while Blair took Jim through his sensory exercises, checking his levels and bringing them back to normal. It wasn’t difficult for Jim to adjust his levels but whenever he was distracted, which was often, his senses would go back to the same levels they’d been at when he first woke. It was as though, having been set at those levels for so long by the drugs, his body naturally reverted to them unless Jim consciously maintained them. So far, he hadn’t reached that level of instinctive control.

“Okay, buddy, it’s time for a break. Why don’t you wash up then relax for a while.” He led Jim to the tiny utility area and left him to clean up. “We can go for a walk outside later, if you want to.”

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Jim was already peeling out of his clothes without any trace of self-consciousness, and Blair didn’t know if it was because he enjoyed showing off in front of his guide, or because, being blind, it didn’t really occur to him that Blair might be watching.

Either way, Blair found it uncomfortable and made a point of turning away to boil some water for tea. The little cooker was slow and by the time the water was boiling Jim had finished his wash and dropped onto the bed. When Blair turned to ask him what he wanted to drink, his sentinel was already fast asleep.

Blair stood looking down at his naked body, pleasure at the signs that Jim was putting on weight and firming his muscles replacing the arousal that was an almost constant presence these days. It had been just a week ago yesterday that Jim had woken from his drugged state and already he was noticeably filling out, though he still had a long way to go, judging by the sturdy framework of bones that showed at his shoulders and wrists and hips.

With a little sigh, Blair pulled the covers over him and went to sit in the armchair with his tea. The little datascreen Nathaniel had lent him still contained a lot of information on sentinels, nutrition, and a host of other things Blair needed to know.

The most depressing of these was the legal status of sentinels and guides. It appeared that sentinels automatically became wards of the Institute from the moment they were diagnosed with sentinel abilities. Sure, they could attain a legal majority, but there was no age limit to the guardianship; sentinels could only achieve independent adult status when the Institute decided they were ready for it. Some never did. Jim was likely to be one of them, given their current situation.

Worse, it was likely that the Institute had already declared him a rogue, which meant lethal force was automatically permissible. If the Institute guards found them, they would almost certainly shoot first and ask questions later.

As a guide, Blair’s position was only slightly better. His legal majority was more or less assured, provided he survived to the age of twenty-one. However he could be held accountable for any criminal act committed by a sentinel in his care. He’d lain awake last night wondering miserably how long that list had already become. Not that, in the end, it mattered. He’d rather die than let Jim be put back on those damned drugs.

He sighed despondently and brought up the next file. Halfway down the first page he shut it down, blushing faintly. The article was a description of what looked like an ancient bonding ceremony between a sentinel and guide. He’d never seen it before, and probably, no other person outside Thomas’ tribe ever had either. Or perhaps it was just because of his age that he’d never been allowed to see it. It was certainly X-rated material.

The next file was a dry and academic review of various articles about the resurgence of interest in sentinels in the late Twentieth Century, and Blair plunged into it with a sense of relief. Much as he would once have enjoyed reading about the bonding ceremony – for a variety of reasons – now it seemed a damn sight too personal. Besides, he’d found living in a constant state of unrelieved semi-arousal to be distinctly unpleasant. Reading that file was hardly likely to improve the situation.

Half an hour later, aware that he’d retained very little of the information he’d just read, Blair put the datascreen aside with a sigh and stretched. He wandered over to the bed and sat on the edge, watching Jim sleep. It would be so good to stretch out beside Jim and sleep for a while, since he hadn’t slept well last night. He was seriously thinking of doing just that when Jim stirred and yawned, then turned his face up to Blair’s with a smile.

For a moment Blair almost believed Jim could see him, but his eyes were aimed just a little to the right of Blair’s face. Jim stretched and let his hand drop onto Blair’s jeans clad thigh. “Hey. Did I sleep long?”

“About an hour.” Blair twined his fingers with Jim’s. “Want some tea or coffee?”

Jim shook his head and patted the bed invitingly with his free hand. His cheeks pinked a little and his smile became diffident. “You wanna join me?”

There was nothing Blair would like better, but he hesitated. The smile faded and Jim started to turn away. Blair couldn’t bear to see that withdrawal again, couldn’t bear to hurt Jim at all. “Hey, it’s okay. I was just thinking we should go for a walk, but we can do that later.”

He lay down on his side facing Jim and brushed the long fringe of hair out of his sentinel’s eyes. They were fixed on his, such a pure, clear blue, like crystal. It seemed impossible – and so wrong – that they couldn’t see him. He stroked Jim’s cheek pensively, thinking how sad he often looked. Partly, he thought, it was the downward tilt of his eyes at the outer corner, which gave him an air of melancholy that only completely dissipated when he smiled. For the rest… well, there hadn’t been much in Jim’s life to bring him happiness.

“I can feel you looking at me.” Jim’s voice was soft, almost playful.

Blair smiled. “Yeah? Want me to stop?”

Jim shook his head almost shyly, and Blair felt his heart thud, not hard, but with an awful finality, and then begin to race. He caught his breath, not wanting to alarm Jim, who was always quick to pick up on his physical reactions. When he thought he could speak without revealing his sudden confusion he said quietly “I like to look at you.”

The smile that crossed Jim’s face was sweet and unshadowed, banishing all traces of sadness. Blair traced the line of his bottom lip with a trembling finger. He’d never felt such a mixture of tenderness, joy, and desire as he did right now. This wasn’t a guide thing; it wasn’t friendship, or even sex. This is love, he thought, as he pressed his lips against Jim’s. I love Jim. I love him.

The kiss was sweet and slow as they always were. They could do this for hours and never tire of it. Blair became so lost in the gentle undulation of Jim’s tongue against his own that he barely noticed when a large, warm hand crept under his loose T-shirt and began to stroke his back. But when it swept down his side, so lightly that it raised goosebumps of pleasure on his skin, he came back to earth with a thud. “Jim…”

“It’s okay. Blair, I want to do this, I _really_ want to.” Jim held on determinedly with one hand in the small of Blair’s back while his other hand rested lightly against Blair’s ribs. “We should have already been lovers by now. You know that.”

Most sentinel-guide pairs were lovers before their fifteenth birthdays, having been allowed to experiment sexually with their partners even before they reached puberty. The childish explorations usually developed into full intercourse in early adolescence, and not even the Institute, which rejected almost all of the more esoteric legends surrounding the sentinel-guide bond, had ever denied the fundamental need of sentinel and guide to become lovers. Sex education, appropriate to their ages, was an important and ongoing part of their training.

Blair was well aware of this fact, despite having never been educated by the Institute. It was one of many reasons why the more conservative areas of society disapproved so vehemently of the Institute. He could understand the reasoning on both sides, but his concerns, in this case, were for a very particular reason.

“Jim, I _know_ … but you’re… your body may be twenty-three, but mentally, emotionally, you’re only thirteen.” Blair rested his head against Jim’s shoulder for a moment and heaved a frustrated sigh. He wanted so badly to make love to Jim, even more now that he understood the depth of his own feelings. But what he didn’t know was how Jim felt about him. “It just doesn’t seem right.”

“And you’re sixteen. It’s only _three_ years.” Jim shifted restlessly against him. “Besides, I don’t think my body cares about that. I think it _needs_ …”

Blair looked up. Jim was biting his lip, clearly upset and just as clearly unable to put his feelings into words. “What is it? Tell me, Jim.”

“They used to say… the older kids…  that if you didn’t have sex with your guide, you’d go crazy. They said…”

Blair laughed, then stared down at Jim’s utterly serious face. “You really believe that?”

“I don’t know.” The vacant eyes filled with tears suddenly. “I just feel… I can’t even get hard, but it _hurts_ … I just need to… to touch you.”

And there was another problem. Over a week after coming off the drugs, Jim was still showing no sign of being able to respond physically to the kissing and gentle petting that drove Blair almost crazy with desire.

He considered that for a moment. Blair knew he was probably more sexually experienced than most guys his age. He suspected he was more easily aroused than most. But the last two weeks with Jim, he’d been living on a knife’s edge of sexual tension that he’d never experienced before. Was his body telling him the same thing as Jim’s?

“I don’t know what to do,” he admitted, finally. “I don’t know what’s right, Jim.”

“This is right.” Jim’s hands skimmed over his back, drawing his T-shirt up over his shoulders, his head. “ _We’re_ right.”

He let Jim lead the way, easing down against the warm bare chest with a soft groan of pleasure, and returning kiss for kiss as Jim explored his back and arms and shoulders with gentle, tentative caresses. Hesitantly, Blair allowed himself to respond, let his hands wander over wide shoulders and the broad smooth chest. Jim sighed in pleasure and mirrored his movements. Then one of those long fingers brushed his nipple and fire raced through Blair’s veins.

“Here… like this…” And he eased Jim’s head down against his chest, guiding him to the aching peak. Jim nuzzled curiously and brushed his tongue tip over it, then closed his lips around the hard flesh. “Oh…. yeah… oh, Jim…”

It was like being drenched in warm honey, thick and heavy, weighing down his limbs with indolent pleasure. He’d never felt such a wondrous sensation in his life, and could have lain there for hours listening to the noisy, enthusiastic suckling and feeling that sweet tugging at his nipple. But Jim’s hands were still moving, wanting more of him, sending tremors through his skin, and fiery hunger into his veins. When they reached his jeans and fumbled with the buttons, Blair pushed them gently aside and did the job himself. His hips lifted instinctively as Jim shoved his jeans and boxers down.

It quickly became obvious that Jim didn’t know how to go about jerking off another guy. His fingers wrapped around Blair’s cock, but the angle was wrong and his movements were awkward, more uncomfortable than arousing. It shattered Blair’s contentment, dragging him back to earth with an almost audible thud. Jim knew it, too, and groaned Blair’s name in frustration.

“It’s all right. Let me help you…” He laid his hand over Jim’s and guided it along the shaft, straining into the clasp of their joined hands, but still not finding the right pressure, the right angle to bring him relief. He shifted Jim’s hand down, cupped it around his balls, and _that_ Jim knew how to do. His fingers kneaded gently, firmly, and the heel of his hand pressed against the base of Blair’s cock sending frissons of pure ecstasy through it with each tiny movement. Blair clutched his cock, desperate to finish, his hand sliding up and down the shaft, his thumb flicking over the slick cockhead until he thought he’d explode with the pressure inside him. Then Jim moved his head, blindly nuzzling Blair’s chest until he located the other nipple, and sucked it greedily. It was the trigger Blair needed. His hips lifted, jerking violently, and his cock pulsed. White light flashed somewhere behind his eyes, and he surrendered to the overwhelming force of it, barely aware of the semen spattering across his chest in scorching strands.

Jim was holding him, cradled securely in his arms. It felt wonderful, almost as good as the sex. Almost. Blair sighed and rubbed his cheek against Jim’s chest, then wrinkled his nose at the smell of sex. With a mumbled apology, he pulled out of Jim’s arms and scrubbed off the worst of the sticky semen with his T-shirt. While he was at it, he removed his jeans and boxers completely before turning back to Jim.

“That was… it was incredible, Jim.” He kissed Jim’s lips lingeringly, stroked his cheek.  “Do you want me to try…?”

“Please…” Jim smiled nervously. He captured Blair’s hand and carried it to his chest. “I want to do it. I want us to be right together.”

“We _are_ right, buddy.” Blair kissed Jim again, and rubbed his hand gently against Jim’s breastbone. His heart was aching with love for his sentinel – god, for his lover – and all he wanted was to give Jim the same pleasure he’d felt. “It just might take a while, is all. It’s okay.”

He looked down at Jim’s body, covered from the hips down by blankets. So beautiful. He pulled the blankets aside, trying not to be put off by the sight of Jim’s lax cock. He kissed Jim’s belly, then his cock. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Blair.” Jim sighed and shifted restlessly. “I’m sorry I can’t…”

“Shh. Don’t say that.” He silenced Jim the best way he could, with his own lips. “Tell me if you like something. Or if you don’t, okay? I want to know.”

“Okay.”

He set about exploring Jim’s body in minute detail, trying to imagine what it would be like for a sentinel in full control of his senses to make love. Every last inch of him was kissed, licked, stroked and teased, and Jim responded with gasps and moans and the occasional giggle. Blair found a couple of particularly sensitive spots, and lingered there, but nothing seemed to make any difference to Jim’s level of arousal.

Perhaps that was wrong… Jim was showing all the signs of arousal except for the most obvious one. His cock had barely stirred. Blair stroked it lightly with his fingers, considering his next move. “Can you feel this, Jim?”

“Oh yeah… it feels good.” Jim swallowed and smiled waveringly. “It feels really good.”

“Okay.” Blair kissed the soft tip, ran his tongue over the rounded surface and then sucked it firmly. He didn’t need to ask, as Jim let loose an eloquent groan. Taking a deep breath, Blair lifted the cock to his lips, taking half of it into his mouth and sucking strongly. With his thumb and forefinger circling the lower half, he began to stimulate Jim’s cock using every trick he knew.

Long minutes later, his only reward was a slight swelling in the shaft. Evidently, nothing was going to happen. He released Jim’s cock, trying not to signal his disappointment, but one look at Jim’s face told him all he needed to know.

“I’m sorry.” Tears filled the pale blue eyes and spilled out the corners. “Blair, I…”

“It’s all right.” He lay down beside Jim, and snuggled up close. He kissed away the tears and drew Jim’s head down onto his chest, wrapping his arms around the larger frame of his lover. “It’s just going to take a bit of time. Nathaniel said there’d be… effects… for a while.”

“What if…”

“It’s _going_ to be all right.” Blair spoke firmly, and hoped he was right.

***

“Okay now, Jim. Are you grounded?” Blair tightened his arms around Jim’s torso, pulling him back a little further into the V of his legs. The dappled sunlight played across their bodies, enticing him with thoughts of how it would look on Jim’s bare skin, but he pushed the temptation aside. They were here to work. Receiving an affirmative, Blair took a deep breath. “Okay, I want you to extend your hearing a little. What can you hear?”

“Insects. They’re all over the place.” Jim shifted restlessly. “I can hear birds and…” he cocked his head a little. “There’s a stream. I think it’s quite close.”

“That’s good. Try setting your level a little bit higher.” Blair carefully kept any excitement out of his voice. The stream, as he was well aware, was easily a kilometre or more from where they were now. Jim was doing pretty well, even if his unconscious control was still far from perfect.

Jim shook his head in frustration. “I don’t hear anything more.” Then he yelped as a bird suddenly chirped in a nearby tree.

“Bring it down.” Blair rubbed his chest soothingly, pleased when Jim took a shaky breath and relaxed almost immediately. “That’s great, Jim. You recovered really well. We’ll just take a breather and then we’ll try something else.”

Jim sighed and let his head fall back to rest on Blair’s shoulder. His hair brushed Blair’s cheek and once again Blair had to fight the temptation to start something. The urge to make love with Jim had become a constant nagging ache, and no matter how often Jim jerked him off or, more recently, sucked him, he was always left with a hollow sensation afterward. Sometimes he wondered if he shouldn’t have let things go as far as they had, other times he felt half crazy with the need to go even further. In the few random moments that he wasn’t consumed with desire Blair wondered whether this was what love ought to be like, but it didn’t feel like an emotional reaction. It felt like a physical craving, like a drug he needed but didn’t have.

It didn’t help that he knew they wouldn’t be able to stay much longer on the reservation. Now, it was even more essential that Jim learn how to use his other senses to compensate for his blindness. It was almost unheard of, in this day and age, for anyone to be blind, and of course the Institute had used that fact in their descriptions of the rogue sentinel and guide. It still made him grit his teeth in anger, when Blair thought about the newscasts that Thomas had described to him. At least he’d found out that the security guard had survived, though with serious injuries.

“Okay, let’s try smell this time.” Blair forced the dark thoughts from his mind and brushed a kiss across Jim’s temple. Only one thing mattered now, and that was ensuring his sentinel’s safety. “See if you can smell the stream. Just don’t raise your level above seven. Ready?”

“Sure.” Jim smiled faintly and Blair saw his nostrils flare. “I can smell something better than water. Mary’s bringing us more of that venison stew. Yum.”

“We’d better get back then.” But Jim made no move to stand, and Blair was effectively trapped against the young pine he chosen for a backrest.

“There’s no hurry. She hasn’t even reached the trees yet.” Jim stretched lazily and nuzzled his ear. “We’ve got a good ten minutes before we need to move.”

“How do you know?” Blair asked curiously. He didn’t doubt his sentinel, but surely Jim couldn’t tell distance from the scent of the stew.

“I can hear the way the long grass swishes around her legs. The grass under the trees is much shorter.” Jim sounded smug, and well he might. That was impressive, even for a fully functioning sentinel.

“All the same, we’d better get back.” Blair pushed at Jim’s shoulder reluctantly, and they both rose. “Think you can follow me back without holding on to my arm?”

Jim grinned, full of boyish charm and arrogance. For a moment he almost looked thirteen. “Sure.”

And he did. Blair was elated, even though Jim’s progress could be a variable thing, sometimes making huge improvements almost overnight, and then slipping back. Overall, he was still increasing his range and control, but with the prospect of being on the run again looming closer, nothing was likely to soothe Blair’s concern in a hurry.

They arrived back at the cabin well before Mary, and Blair started heating water so he could offer her a mug of tea. As usual, she wanted to check Jim out, but this time Mary also inspected Blair, much to his surprise. She harrumphed softly when she was done and accepted the tea and a slice of bread slathered with butter and preserves. “Blair, Jim, you do not have much time. When are you two going to complete the bond?”

“What?” Jim’s head turned first toward Mary, then Blair. “What do you mean?”

Blair shrank a little under Mary’s stern gaze. “Nathaniel gave you the file. Didn’t you read it?” She shook her head. “I told Thomas they should talk to you, but they felt you would prefer to read it in private.”

He knew which file she was referring to and blushed. “I looked at it. I didn’t read it all.”

“Hmm. You can’t have read much.” The wrinkled face split into a wicked grin. “If you had, you’d be blushing much worse.”

“Blair, what’s she talking about?” Jim sounded worried, and Blair went over and took his hand.

“It’s some old ceremony.” Blair looked appealingly at the old lady. “I didn’t think it was important.”

“Well, it is.” She spoke firmly. “Sentinel and guide must complete their bond, or the sentinel will lose his powers, the guide will not be able to direct him. The pair who refuse the bond will sicken and die. You can feel the need of it in your bowels and your manhood, no?”

“I… I…” Blair was blushing furiously now, and even Jim, who was completely brazen, was turning pink. “But we… I mean…”

Jim blurted out what Blair was stumbling to say. “We have sex. At least…” he tightened his grip on Blair’s hand. “This is my fault.”

“No! Jim, it’s not!” Blair hugged him urgently, looking over his shoulder at Mary. “Jim can’t… he… we can’t… we’ve tried, but those drugs…”

Mary pursed her lips. “Have you talked to Nathaniel about this?”

Blair shook his head. “No. I thought it would just take some time. That Jim would… you know… get better.”

“Perhaps he will.” Mary sighed. “You should complete the bond as soon as possible, my children. There may not be a lot of time before you have to leave here.”

***

That night when they crawled into bed, Blair found himself wrapped in a comprehensive embrace. “I think we should do it now.”

Blair resisted the urge to wriggle free. “But you can’t…”

“ _You_ can. Maybe that’ll be enough.” Jim spoke firmly, his determination plain. “Besides, if it helps me with my senses, then maybe it’ll help me get a hard on.”

“I don’t think it will. That’s a whole different thing.”

“You never know.” The absurdly hopeful tone brought a smile to Blair’s lips. He kissed his sentinel and Jim tightened his arms a little. “If we have to leave soon, we’re gonna need every little bit of edge we can get.”

The argument was undeniably true. Blair sighed and relaxed against Jim’s broad chest. He’d been thinking about little else all afternoon, but with the hunger pulling at him, he didn’t entirely trust his own decision making ability. There was only one thing he was certain of – he couldn’t take chances with Jim’s safety. “We’ll take it slowly, okay? I’ve never done this before, not being on top, and I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Okay.” It didn’t take sentinel abilities to feel Jim’s heart rate rocket. His own wasn’t far behind.

Blair kissed him slowly, teasing apart pliant lips and stroking slowly against Jim’s mobile tongue. They lay like that for a while, kissing and petting while Blair’s arousal grew. He began to thrust gently against Jim’s thigh, wanting to take the edge off before he went any further.

“Blair…” Jim moaned softly, but his hands came down to grip Blair’s hips, pushing him away a little. “Should I turn over?”

“No. I want to come first, okay? We’ll fuck later.” He brushed his hand over Jim’s chest and Jim moaned again. The hands that had pushed him away drew him back again, urging him on as he rubbed his cock urgently against Jim’s thigh. Their hands collided as each tried to touch the other, and they ended up with both clasped around Blair’s cock. He didn’t even try to hold back, surrendering with a ragged cry as his cock pulsed out the slippery semen.

He lay against Jim’s chest, panting, but with a tingling in his belly that told him it wouldn’t belong before he’d be ready to go again. Just the thought of burying himself inside Jim’s beautiful, willing body was driving him crazy with desire, regardless of his ability to do anything about it.

“We’ll need some oil.” Jim kissed him and slipped out of the bed. Blair watched in dreamy satisfaction as Jim crossed the room to the utility area and wiped Blair’s cum off his belly and thighs. He returned with a small bottle and placed it on the nightstand beside the bed.

“Here. Give it to me and lie down.” Blair opened the bottle and poured a little of the oil over his fingers. When Jim was settled face down on the bed he slipped his fingers into the cleft of Jim’s ass and began to stroke the soft, puckered asshole. Jim gasped and wriggled against his hand. “I’m gonna take it real slow, okay?”

“Yeah.” Jim answered him in a breathless whisper. “Feels good.”

“I know.” He kissed Jim’s back between his shoulder blades. “Just relax and enjoy. Take slow deep breaths.”

He could hear Jim comply and the long body shivered as he pressed a little more firmly, circling the opening, teasing with his fingertips. He leaned against Jim, one leg slung across Jim’s to get him used to the feel of a body on top of him, and continued to kiss and lick and nibble every single vertebra. The tremors increased, becoming a steady thrumming as Jim responded to his touch.

When Jim began to push against his fingers Blair allowed the movement to carry one cautious fingertip inside his body. The sentinel froze and shuddered, moaning with obvious pleasure. “More. Blair, please… more.”

“Shh. We don’t want to go too fast, okay?” He kissed Jim’s shoulder and shifted so more of his weight was on his lover’s body. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

He let his finger slide a little deeper, carefully probing, stroking the smooth walls of Jim’s ass. Jim’s hips surged backwards and suddenly Blair’s finger was buried to the hilt. “It’s so good, Blair.”

“It’s gonna get better. Just take a deep breath and as you let it out I want you to go limp, okay?” He waited until Jim had obeyed and withdrew his finger almost completely before adding a second. It felt tight, and the ring of muscle clenched around the two fingers in a brief spasm. “Do it again, Jim.”

Another deep breath and long exhale relaxed Jim’s body still further. Blair began to slide his fingers in and out, slow and easy. He licked away the sweat dewing Jim’s back and began to rub himself against Jim’s buttock. His cock was just beginning to harden again and pleasure shimmered though his veins.

It seemed like Jim was getting the hang of relaxing his sphincter muscle, and Blair took advantage of it, adding a third finger without too much difficulty. Jim, lying with his head buried between his arms, was moaning helplessly and pushing back against Blair’s fingers at every stroke.

“Won’t be long, babe.” Blair nudged Jim’s thighs a little further apart with his knee. Withdrawing his fingers, he nudged his cock between Jim’s ass cheeks, rubbing slowly, adding pre-cum to the oil that was already there and coating his cock at the same time. He’d need more, though, and he reached for the bottle and dribbled the oil over his cock without stopping his movements. The slick glide felt incredible enough and Jim’s enthusiastic moans doubled in volume; he couldn’t wait to be inside that fantastic body.

“Take another deep breath, Jim. Hold it in.” He had to force himself to speak commandingly, using his ‘guide voice’, but he had to be sure that Jim would still respond to it, even in the depths of arousal. Jim did as he was told, his body vibrating with the effort to obey. “Good, now let it out and relax.”

As Jim followed his instructions, Blair pressed forward, allowing the movement of Jim’s body against his own to carry his cock inside. Before he knew it, he was more than halfway in. They both groaned with mingled relief and pleasure. “Oh, Jim… you feel so damn good. So good…”

He flexed his hips cautiously and slid a little deeper. “Is this okay? Am I hurting you?”

Jim’s head shook from side to side, still buried between his arms. “It’s okay. A bit stretched, that’s all.” He was trembling helplessly.

“Tell me if I hurt you. If you want me to stop.” He kissed the back of Jim’s neck. “I love you, Jim. I love you so much.”

“Love you too…” Jim stirred restlessly. “Please, Blair…”

“It’s all right.” Blair nuzzled Jim’s neck and began to thrust slowly, though it was becoming difficult to maintain control. Each thrust took him a little deeper, until he was fully inside Jim’s body. He took another breather then, until Jim’s almost inaudible pleas forced him to move again.

Jim’s legs parted still further and Blair slipped down a little, changing the angle of their bodies. On the next thrust Jim cried out and Blair froze, until he realised that he’d brushed against Jim’s prostate. So that was how it felt, from the other side. He smiled and pressed a kiss to Jim’s heaving shoulder. There was no point now in holding back. He began to thrust in earnest, taking care to hit Jim’s prostate on every second or third stroke.

There was no reason to drag this out; he was more than ready to climax, and the sooner he did, the less sore Jim was likely to be afterwards. On that thought, his body rebelled. Blair plunged deep one last time and felt his cock pulse, held firmly inside Jim’s body. Jim felt it too, of course, and gave a low moan as Blair’s semen exploded inside him. Blair collapsed across Jim’s back with a sob and for several minutes all he could hear was the pounding of his heart and his own and Jim’s ragged breathing.

Gradually, his cock softened, and Blair forced himself to move. Far enough, at least, that he was lying beside Jim instead of on top of him. “Jim, are you okay?”

A faint affirmative reassured him on that point. He ran his hand from Jim’s shoulder down to his buttock, feeling the lingering tremors deep within his muscles. He silently urged Jim to roll onto his side and brushed his fingers against Jim’s cock, disappointed, but not surprised, to find it still lax and with no evidence of orgasm. He stroked the sensitive flesh gently.

“It’s all right.” Jim smiled weakly. “It was wonderful, Blair. It felt… incredible.”

He moved into Jim’s arms, wanting to bury himself inside Jim in an entirely different way. “I wonder if it worked.”

Jim’s body shook, and it took him a moment to realise that his lover was laughing weakly. “If it didn’t, then we’ll just have to keep trying.”

Oh, yeah…

***

The faint moonlight brushed the trees and the air with bluish silver. Blair paused for a moment, wondering at the unearthly beauty of it, then continued to walk along the path, only faintly delineated by trampled grasses. Jim should be somewhere near by; he could almost feel his sentinel’s presence.

Ahead of him, a blurred pattern of pale and dark resolved suddenly into a wolf, standing motionless, its breath clouding in the chill air. Blair stopped, feeling certain he ought to be afraid of the beautiful animal, but unable to feel any emotion other than awe. The wolf regarded him with an air of calm superiority for a moment, then whined sharply, turned, and ran down the path a dozen paces before stopping to look over its shoulder at him.

“You want me to follow you?” Blair shrugged. He’d realised by now that this was a dream, so he supposed he might as well go along with it. He began to walk again, following the wolf, which trotted along the path, tail held proudly aloft.

“Blair?”

He opened his eyes reluctantly, then squinted them shut against the bright golden light that flooded the room. Blair wriggled to settle himself even more comfortably against Jim’s body. His sentinel was holding him in a loose embrace against his shoulder, and the two of them were propped up against a mound consisting of every pillow the cabin contained. One of Jim’s large hands cupped his head while the other stroked his thigh. Blair sighed and snuggled unashamedly, dismissing the dream in favour of waking delights.

“Blair, someone’s coming.” Jim nuzzled his hair and then kissed his lips as Blair turned his face up. “Two people. Strangers.”

“Damn.” His sigh this time was one of resignation rather than pleasure. “I suppose we’d better get dressed.”

“Guess so.”

Jim released him as Blair reluctantly wriggled out from between his legs. Damn, he was half hard and ready to play, though in a tiny part of his mind alarm bells were ringing. It was too early for visitors, and Jim had said they were strangers. Something was wrong. Rousing himself from his sensual lassitude, Blair hurried to dress himself. Jim was doing the same, and by the time their visitors were close, they were ready and waiting.

Standing well back from the window, Blair could still see the pair, a young man and woman, hurrying towards the cabin. They were carrying a backpack each and seemed completely intent on reaching their goal.

Before they could knock, Blair opened the door. “Hi.”

He smiled at their obvious surprise, but the young man recovered quickly. “Thomas sent us. He said you have to go now.”

Blair’s stomach sank, and he was relieved to feel Jim’s body close behind him. “What’s happened?”

“We don’t know. Thomas just said to tell you that you have to go.” The young woman spoke almost apologetically. “We have to stay here for a few days, he said.”

Blair nodded slowly and opened the door wider. “Come in. We’ll just get our things.”

Jim had already moved away and was retrieving the backpack that contained their clothing. The young couple stood just inside the door, watching. They probably knew nothing more than what they’d said. There was no need; the plans had been made days ago, now it only remained to carry them out.

“Thomas said to give you this,” the young man held out one of the backpacks, “and these.”

“Thanks.” Blair took the two disks from his outstretched hand. They were worn with age and frequent handling, though the leather thongs they were strung on were new. The symbols were slightly different on each, and something told him which was his and which belonged to Jim. He hung his disk around his neck and felt a shiver pass through his body. Then he tucked it carefully inside his shirt. “Tell Thomas, thank you. Tell him, we’ll…” his throat closed up and he swallowed.

“Tell him we’ll treasure them.” Jim’s voice steadied him, a hand on his shoulder directed him to the door. “We’d better hurry. You know what to do?”

“We’re to clean everything and burn sage to purify the cabin.” The young woman giggled with obvious embarrassment. “Then… well, we’ve just got married, two days ago…”

They both blushed and Blair almost laughed out loud. Burning the sage should help mask any residual scent not dealt with by the cleaning. Add to that the pheromones these two must be throwing off and the Institute’s chances of finding traces of his and Jim’s presence were miniscule.

“Well, good luck.” He kissed the young bride and shook her husband’s hand. “I hope we’ll meet again some time.”

He shouldered the pack and walked out without looking back.

There was no way to tell how far away the Institute guards might be. Not yet on the reservation, or Jim would have sensed them, but obviously Thomas had had some kind of advance warning. Blair hurried down the path towards the stream Jim had scented all those days ago. There was a canoe waiting for them there and they would be safe as long as they stuck close to the tree-lined banks.

Of course, once the stream reached the river, they’d have to hide until darkness came. Best not to think too far ahead, though. Blair walked a little faster, certain that Jim would be able to keep up. They didn’t talk.

***

Nightfall found them on the move again. They’d dozed on and off through the afternoon. Jim had insisted on keeping watch most of the time, so he could hear any danger approaching, but nothing had come near. He’d waited until just before sunset, then, grounded by Blair’s hand on his shoulder and Blair’s low-voiced monologue, had extended his senses as far as he could.

Coming out of it, Jim’s mouth tightened to a grim line.

“What is it?” Blair rubbed his arm firmly. “What did you get?”

“They’re at the reservation. I don’t think they’ve found the cabin yet, but they’ve rounded up all the people and they’re questioning them.” Jim’s fists clenched helplessly. “They’re being… they’ve been pretty rough with some of them. Not the elders, but Nathaniel… and some of the others.”

Blair swallowed his nausea. “Is he okay? Have they hurt him?”

“Nothing serious, but…” Jim flushed suddenly, his lips trembling. “This is happening because they helped us. It’s just not fair.”

“No, it’s not, but we can’t do anything.” Blair hugged him. “It’s time we started. It’ll be completely dark soon.”

They ate some of the food Thomas had sent them in the backpack and readied the canoe. It was going to be a long night.

The river, once they reached it, was more difficult to negotiate. It was running considerably faster than the stream had, and there were frequent crosscurrents and shallows that tested their beginner’s skills to the limit. Blair was aware of Jim’s silence behind him, and how tired he must be after the lack of sleep this afternoon. He tried to make up for it by paddling harder, but only succeeded in making his arms and shoulders ache.

By the time the sky behind them was starting to lighten, Blair knew they were in trouble. Between them they managed to ground the canoe and clamber out, weak at the knees after so long in a confined space.

“We missed the fork, Jim. We should have got to the lake by now.” There was a settlement on the lakeshore that Thomas had told them would give shelter to them for a few days, but now they didn’t even have that.

“I’m sorry. I should have heard it.” Jim shook his head, his face drawn. “We’ll have to hide out for the day and backtrack tonight.”

“I guess.” Blair hugged him, “but it’s not your fault, okay? There was enough moonlight. I should have seen it.”

They made camp under a grove of trees, not daring to light a fire, but eating their supplies cold. Then they wrapped themselves in the thermal blankets to cut down their heat signal emissions and pulled the canoe over them, upside down, to further confuse any scanners. Blair fell asleep immediately.

***

He woke from confused dreams to find Jim wrapped around him, almost on top of him, and twitching faintly as he, too, dreamed. Blair grinned and slid out from under his sentinel and the canoe to check their surroundings.

It was late afternoon, by the angle of the sun, and warm, in spite of the high clouds. He pissed against a tree with a sigh of relief and made his way down to the river to wash his hands and face. When he got back, Jim was awake.

“Hey.” He leaned down and kissed his lover. “It’s still a way to go before dark.”

“Yeah.” Jim sounded distracted. He sniffed, made his way to the same tree Blair had used and emptied his bladder. “I’m just gonna wash up.”

“Okay.” Blair resisted the impulse to follow him to the river. He certainly had enough confidence in Jim’s ability to get there and back without drowning himself; it was just an instinctive reluctance to let his sentinel get too far away from him.

Jim was back in a couple of minutes, looking more alert. They ate in silence and Blair wondered how much longer their supplies would last. They should have been at their next stopping point by now and not in need of them.

“There’s a road up ahead.” Jim inclined his head eastwards. “I can hear the traffic.”

That could be a bad thing. “Very far?”

“A couple of kilometres.” Jim frowned. “Blair, I had this dream…”

“Yeah?”

“There were trees, lots of them and everything was blue.”

It sounded a lot like the place he’d dreamed about. “Was there a wolf?”

“No.” Jim frowned slightly. “Why?”

“I had a dream about a blue forest and there was a wolf. It was like he wanted me to follow him. But then I woke up.” Curiosity stirred inside him as the memory surfaced. “It was yesterday morning, just before… you’re sure there wasn’t a wolf somewhere?”

“There wasn’t a wolf, but I saw a cat. A big one, black, like a panther.” Jim shifted restlessly. “I kinda felt like it wanted me to follow it too. But we’re going west, right now and if we backtrack we’ll be going east. It wanted us to go south.”

“How do you know? Blair grinned. The whole thing seemed kinda crazy. “Did it say ‘go south’ or something?”

Jim shrugged. “I just know.”

Maybe it was some sentinel instinct, or some long forgotten memory suddenly resurfacing. Or maybe it wasn’t. “You know the early sentinels – the modern ones, Twentieth Century – some of the stories say they saw animal spirits. D’you think those dreams could be something like that?”

It was a cool idea, that they had animal spirits watching over them, but Blair wasn’t sure whether he was ready to go in entirely the wrong direction just because Jim had dreamt about a big black cat.

“If we went south, where would we go?” Jim hunched his shoulders a little defensively and didn’t answer, but his own question got Blair thinking. “You know, Naomi and I spent some time at an organic orchard and vineyard outside of San Fran once. There are a whole lot of places like that in California and it’s just getting to harvest time for the apricots. We could get work on one, I’m sure. And it’s close to Mexico, so we could easily get across the border if we had to.”

“Do you want to do that?” Jim sounded unsure of himself, but hopeful too.

“You really believe we should go south, don’t you?” Jim nodded decisively, and that was enough for Blair. “Okay. I guess that means finding the road and hitching a lift.”

They took the canoe back to the river and weighted it down with stones until water sloshed over the side so they could sink it under the overhang of the bank. If he could, he’d send word to Thomas so somebody could come retrieve it. Then they set out walking towards the road.

It was a given that their pictures would have been circulated, but they’d already prepared for that. Thomas had cut Jim’s hair to a military style buzz cut, and while Blair mourned the loss of that thick mop of dark hair, it certainly accentuated the strong planes of Jim’s cheekbones and jaw and made him look considerably older. Jim was wearing a pair of wraparound shades, which served to cover for his blindness. His other senses were strong enough to compensate for the lack of sight and Blair was confident he could carry it off.

His own hair was several centimetres longer than it had been, since he’d started growing it out before returning to the Institute, and was long enough now to flop over his forehead and cheeks if he bowed his head slightly. It would have to do, but Blair gave silent thanks that the Institute had exaggerated Jim’s condition in the newscasts. People were not likely to see the rogue sentinel and his guide in what appeared to be a couple of perfectly normal young men.

Reaching the road presented no difficulty, but getting a ride turned out to be far from easy. Finally a freight hauler pulled over with a whirring protest of its antigrav unit and the truckie invited them aboard with a genial smile. It turned out he was a talkative soul, happy to have company on his trip, and Blair was hard put to answer all his questions without giving too much away. He dropped them in a small, backwater town where he assured them they could catch a bus to Portland and drove off with a friendly wave.

The credit chips Blair had saved were enough to buy them tickets and a meal at the local diner, and not much more than that. After Portland they would have to hitch again, hopefully with someone who wasn’t as curious as their last ride. By the time the bus arrived, at ten in the evening, Blair was happy enough to curl up against Jim’s side and sleep.

In his dream the wolf grinned at him approvingly and bounded down the dimly lit path.

***

“Done for the day?” Corey grinned at Blair as he manoeuvred the antigrav platform to link with the collection unit and offloaded his last bin of apricots.

Blair nodded, relieved that the long day was finally over. It was getting seriously hot now, and though he’d never minded the heat, he’d also never worked all day in it until taking on this job. “Yeah. I think I’ll go for a swim. Anything happening tonight?”

“Some of the people who are leaving are going to have a barbecue. Could run late.” The older man, one of the commune members, took over the controls remotely, allowing Blair to step off the platform, and then directing it to a powerstation where its batteries would recharge overnight. “This is about the last of the apricots. The plums are just starting to come in. Maybe another week and they‘ll be ready. You and Joey going to stay on?”

“Dunno.” Blair scratched his scalp with both hands, feeling the dust gritty against his fingers. Definitely needed a swim. “We haven’t talked about it. Maybe.”

“You’re more than welcome. Both of you are good workers.” Corey laid a friendly hand on Blair’s shoulder. “There won’t be any wages until the picking starts again, but you’ll have free accommodation and food.”

“We’ll let you know tomorrow.” Blair smiled gratefully at the commune member. It was a good offer, and although he and Jim had been careful about what they spent their wages on, they still didn’t have a lot of credit saved up. Since neither of them had any idea where they’d go once the fruit picking season was over, it might be a good idea to stay on. “Where is Joey, anyway?”

Corey chuckled. “I saw him heading up to the reservoir.”

It was where they all went to swim and relax after a hot day, and this was one of the hottest yet. On the other hand, it would be crowded and Jim tended to avoid crowds, even now. In a large group of people it was more difficult for him to focus his senses enough to compensate for his lack of sight.

“Guess I’ll join him.” Blair lifted a hand in a casual farewell. “Thanks, Corey.”

“Have fun, Jake.” Corey turned away, his attention already shifting to another worker bringing in her last pick of the day.

Making his way up the short, steep rise to the reservoir, Blair made a conscious effort to cast off any concerns about the future and open his mind up. He’d discovered, soon after they arrived here, that if he did that he could usually locate Jim pretty easily. Today was no exception; he felt a kind of tugging that drew his attention to a small scattering of trees not too far from the reservoir.

With Jim located, Blair relaxed and headed for the reservoir, where there was already about a dozen people, swimming and cavorting in the cool water. Before long, there would be a lot more. Blair didn’t bother to join the group, just stripped down to his briefs and dived in. The water felt incredible against his parched, heated skin. Blair surfaced when he needed to breathe and then went under again. Five minutes of that was enough to strip away all the tension of the day and Blair floated for a while, relaxing with his eyes closed.

A loud yell and a miniature tsunami persuaded Blair that the reservoir was getting just a bit too crowded. He swam to the edge and heaved himself out. Once, he would have been all too happy to join in with the playful group, but now all he wanted was to find Jim. Since the area was strictly clothing optional, Blair had no compunction in stripping off his wet briefs and drying himself off with his loose tank top. He pulled on his baggy cotton knit shorts and sandals and headed off in Jim’s direction.

Sure enough, Jim was under the trees, sprawled on his back, eyes closed. Blair paused for a moment to appreciate the sight. Two months of good food and physical work had filled him out to a sleek, muscular perfection that would make anyone’s mouth water. The sun had burnished him to pale bronze and darkened his nipples to a luscious chestnut.

Maybe being blind meant that Jim had no idea what effect his appearance and choice of clothing had on people, but Blair doubted it. His eyes followed the line of long legs up to a pair of the skimpiest cutoffs he’d ever seen that still covered everything they were required to cover. The waistband barely reached Jim’s hipbones and the ragged edges of the legs were high enough at the front to reveal a scattering of dark hairs and the crease where his thigh met his body. Blair smiled reminiscently at the memory of Jim preceding him out to the orchard this morning, the curve of his ass cheeks peeking below the torn denim. No doubt about it, his lover was an exhibitionist.

“Are you just going to stand there?” Jim’s voice, lazily amused, broke through his reverie and Blair noticed that Jim’s right hand was inside the shorts and moving slowly. “Or are you gonna join in?”

Blair grinned. Three weeks ago, Jim had finally ‘come online’ so to speak, and like any kid with a new toy, he wanted to play with it all the time. “I could watch.”

In fact, now that he thought of it, that could be almost as much fun. He leaned against a nearby tree. A faint pink flush on Jim’s cheeks was more likely an indication of arousal than embarrassment. After they’d become lovers, Jim had rapidly lost any sense of modesty he’d possessed, at least in his guide’s presence.

Blair watched as Jim swallowed, his adam’s apple bobbing, and smiled. The hand that had been resting behind his head came down to toy with his left nipple, slowly rubbing and pinching the erect tip. The hand hidden in his shorts moved a little faster, a little more purposefully.

Damn, that was hot. Blair bit his lip for a moment then walked over and dropped to his knees beside Jim. “You could at least let me see.”

“Sure.” Jim slurred the word, already preoccupied with the sensations. “Be my guest.”

Blair tugged the zipper down – the stud at the top was already open – and then the shorts while Jim continued to stroke his half erect cock. He couldn’t have started until Blair had almost reached him. Jim must have been waiting for him, and that thought made Blair ache with love as well as arousal. He sat back on his heels to enjoy the show.

Jim had beautiful hands and a beautiful cock. The sight of those long, elegant fingers moving over the flushed and swollen cock was better than any wet dream Blair had ever had. His body knew, in intimate detail, what those fingers felt like. He didn’t need Jim to touch him to be able to feel it, and Blair felt his own cock filling in sympathetic reaction. He realised, belatedly, that his hand was gently caressing the inside of Jim’s thigh, but didn’t see any reason why he should stop.

A small moan escaped Jim and his cock stiffened into full arousal and lifted against his hand. The first drop of pre-cum escaped from his slit and Blair bent to lick it away. Such a wonderful taste, and still new enough to surprise him every time with its deliciousness. He waited hungrily for the next drop to form.

After the third drop, Blair gave up all pretence of non-involvement and began to suck delicately at Jim’s cockhead. His hand slid up Jim’s thigh to massage his balls. It was all still so new for Jim that he wouldn’t be able to last long, so after a couple of minutes Blair drew back. Jim gave a shuddering moan, his hand moving faster, until Blair laid his over the top.

“Want to fuck me?” His voice was hoarse with arousal and his cock, entirely neglected, was making its protest felt, pushing out the front of his shorts.

A heartfelt groan gave him the affirmative. Jim’s eyes opened slightly, fixing on Blair’s face as though he could see him. “Did you bring any lube?”

“We’ll have to improvise.” Blair lifted Jim’s hand away from his cock and bent over to suck deeply, wetly. In this dry air, saliva wouldn’t last long, but it was all they had, unless… “I’ll jerk myself off. We can use that too.”

He shoved down his shorts and tossed them aside, then straddled Jim’s thighs. He would have to hurry, but even his urgency, and Jim’s, couldn’t stop him from taking pleasure in his own touch. He teased the line of hair running from navel to groin, ruffling the dark, wiry hairs against the direction of their growth. That line had become wider and denser in the last two months, and hair was even beginning to sprout on his chest, much to Jim’s delight.

Tremors ran though his body and he turned his attention to his cock, grasping it firmly and starting a smooth, rapid movement that would bring him off quickly. He didn’t hold back on the little gasps and moans that rose to his lips, knowing that Jim would be focusing on scent and sound now. His hips began to move insistently, pushing into his hand and he rose a little on his knees to facilitate the movement.

“Jim, can you feel it? I’m so close, man… so close.” He groaned deeply as the sensations crested and the glorious release washed over him. He toppled forward, managing to put a hand out to keep himself from falling flat on his face. His other hand squeezed and jerked at his cock, milking the last bit of sensation, the last few drops of cum.

All he could hear was the pounding of his heart and his own and Jim’s raucous breathing. For a moment he was afraid that Jim had come too, but when he managed to pry his eyes open, Blair saw that Jim’s cock was still hard and fiery red at the tip.

Of course, if he had come, they could always have waited ten minutes and tried again, but suddenly even ten minutes was too long to wait for this. They hadn’t had a chance to do it before, since the shared quarters of the dormitories weren’t exactly amenable to full fledged fucking. Sure, everybody had learned to ignore the muffled gasps and groans as their co-workers had paired up for a night of groping and hand jobs, but anything more serious than that meant sleeping outside and the nights were still surprisingly cold at this elevation.

Blair willed the strength back into his arms and legs and pushed himself upright. “Hold on, Jim. Just a little longer.”

Jim nodded, biting his lower lip and clenching his fist even more tightly around the base of his cock. Blair scooped up the slippery semen from Jim’s belly and chest and let it dribble from his fingers onto his cock. He spread it sketchily over the tip and down the shaft, then opened himself quickly with two fingers. There wasn’t time for more, and he positioned the blunt cockhead against his asshole and pushed himself down. Jim groaned raggedly and clutched at Blair’s thighs, fighting for control.

After a couple of panting gasps, he let his breath out in a long sigh and nodded. “I’m okay.”

“Good.” Blair leaned forward and caressed his cheek. “You can move now, buddy.”

Jim bit his lip again and moved his hips experimentally. The angle wasn’t quite right and Blair shifted his balance slightly, holding himself a little way above Jim so he could thrust more easily. The thick cock slid inside him with ease and Jim gasped. “Feels so good.”

“Fantastic. Fucking fantastic, Jim.” Blair adjusted his weight again and the next thrust sent shockwaves of pleasure through him as Jim’s cock brushed his prostate. “Ji-iiim… did you feel that?”

Jim didn’t answer, but his hips moved faster and the friction, combined with the stimulation of his prostate brought Blair’s cock from soft to fully erect in a matter of seconds. “Harder. Harder… please…”

Sweat poured off Jim’s face and chest as he increased the pace. The sounds of their co-workers faded into insubstantiality and all Blair was aware of was the laboured breathing of his lover, and the slapping of Jim’s thighs against his ass. His own breathing reached a ragged crescendo and he had to choke back a cry as his body rebelled. Pearly strands of semen scattered across Jim’s chest for the second time and his ass tightened around Jim’s cock. He felt it swell inside him and pulse sharply as Jim cried out, followed by other, gentler pulses. Jim’s chest was heaving, and he let out a low, helpless moan that sent shudders through Blair’s body.

When the body beneath him relaxed, Blair eased himself off Jim’s softening cock and settled down beside him. They lay in exhausted silence, until Blair was close to falling asleep. A particularly loud shout and laughter from the direction of the reservoir brought him back and he wriggled a little closer to Jim and kissed him to get his attention.

“Wha?”

Blair kissed him again, for the sheer pleasure of it. “How about we sleep up here tonight?”

Jim smiled at him contentedly. “Sure. I’ve been wanting to try out those sleeping bags we bought.”

He yelped with gratifying sharpness when Blair pinched his ribs.

***

The party was still going full throttle when Blair woke, although it was getting close to morning. Even under the trees he could tell the sky was starting to lighten. They could have spent the night in the dorm after all, since it was probably empty, but he was deliciously cosy in the sleeping bag and happy to have Jim’s warm body spooned around him. And, of course, they _did_ need to try out the sleeping bags.

He lay drowsily content, listening to the revelries in the distance. It seemed that many of the pickers would be leaving, to return to college, or go on to another job, and those that stayed behind would have a week of freedom before the fruit picking resumed. Friendships and romances that had blossomed in the last two months would fade away and no doubt new ones would take their place when the new workers arrived.

Blair was intimately familiar with the nomadic lifestyle that some of these people had chosen. He and Naomi had made up a tribe of two for as far back as he could remember; now the tribe consisted of him and Jim. He smiled at the thought and snuggled back into the curve of Jim’s body.

When the wolf appeared, he thought for a moment he was dreaming, but he couldn’t be. The light from the full moon was pure silver with no hint of blue. It must be a real wolf.

It _was_ the same wolf. Identical down to the last marking. He’d had plenty of opportunities to learn its appearance, as both he and Jim had dreamt of their spirit animals several times. He’d never seen it awake before.

The wolf waited patiently, watching him.

“Jim?” He tugged on Jim’s arm, lying heavy and relaxed across his chest. “Jim, wake up.”

“Uh?” Jim stirred vaguely, his arm tightening a little.

Blair poked him with and elbow and spoke sharply, half afraid the wolf would leave. “It’s important, Jim. Wake up.”

Hot air gusted against the back of his neck and when Jim moved again it was more purposefully. “What is it?”

“Can you see a wolf?” Stupid question. Blair tried again. “I can see it. The wolf.”

“There aren’t any wolves in California. At least not in the wild.” He heard Jim sniff deeply. “There sure isn’t any wolf here.”

“It’s not just any wolf, Jim. It’s _The_ Wolf.”

“Oh.” Jim pushed himself up on one elbow and cool air rushed into the gap between their bodies; they both shivered. “What does it want?”

“How the fuck would I know?” But he did. He did. “We have to leave.”

A sigh. Jim nuzzled his neck. “Where are we going?”

They’d discussed this time and time again over the summer; they’d both known they couldn’t remain on the commune forever, but lacking any clear direction and needing funds, they’d stayed.

“I just… south again.” Blair shook his head. “That’s all I get. South and a lot of trees.”

He looked appealingly toward the wolf, which seemed singularly unmoved. Then, gradually, like a fog clearing from the ground, but in reverse, the darker shadow beside the wolf resolved into a large black cat. A jaguar, not a panther, Blair recognised with the tiny part of his brain that was still functioning. The two animals stood there a moment longer and then turned away. Blair couldn’t tell whether they actually moved off or simply disappeared, but they were certainly gone.

“Blair?” Jim was shaking his shoulder and sounding worried.

He twisted around to face his lover. “I saw the jaguar, Jim. Your jaguar. It was with the wolf.”

Jim grinned. “Cool. I thought it was a panther.”

“A jaguar.” Overcome with excitement, Blair kissed Jim soundly, and they could easily have become distracted.

A loud whoop of laughter from the partygoers brought them back to the reality of their situation. The last time the wolf had warned them to leave, the Institute security guards had arrived within hours. Blair dragged himself reluctantly out of the warmth of their joined sleeping bags.

“Fuck! It’s freezing!” He hurriedly pulled on the clothes they’d put in the bottom of the bags to keep warm for morning. “I’ll go down to the dorm and get the rest of our stuff. You pack up what’s here, okay?”

Jim nodded, already half dressed. “You know, south and trees isn’t a lot of help here. Some map co-ordinates would’ve been nice.”

That was his sentinel, always the down to earth one. Blair grinned and kissed him. “We’ll figure it out.”

***

As Blair had expected, getting into Mexico proved no real problem. When the USA and Canada had followed the example of the United States of Central and South America and formed a confederation, Mexico had carved out a lucrative niche for itself, acting as a buffer between two continents which had huge cultural and political differences. Poverty gradually melted away and with it the problem of illegal immigrants. The border controls were now so laissez faire that there were dozens of places where a couple of guys could slip from one country to the other without fear of detection.

They made their way south, still with no real idea of their ultimate destination, but following whatever instincts seemed to be leading them. It took a week to reach Puerto Escondido, the southernmost major town on the west coast. And there they stopped, because the border between Mexico and the USCSA was not nearly so relaxed and, as Jim said, they might as well know where they were headed before they took any more risks.

A few days passed and they spent most of their time relaxing on the beaches. Tourists from all over the world lazed in the sun, surfed, swam, and shopped in the markets; nobody was going to take the slightest notice of two more. It was the perfect cover, as long as their credit held. To save money, they slept in the parks or on the beaches and even in this, they were far from unique.

“Why don’t we go to Peru?”

“Huh?” Blair started out of a light doze and summoned the energy to roll onto his belly. The baking sun on his body left him feeling wonderfully indolent and contented. “Why Peru?”

Jim leaned closer and nibbled his ear. “Isn’t that where the first modern sentinels came from?”

“That’s the legend, but who knows if it’s true?” He tried to remember, because it was the sort of story that he loved, shrouded in mystery and mysticism. The kind of story the Institute, with its distrust of anything that couldn’t be quantified, did its best to stifle. “There’s no real documentation.”

“But we’ve seen the spirit animals.” Jim shrugged. “So if _they’re_ real…”

“You’ve got a point.” Blair grinned. Somehow Jim’s suggestion just felt right. “I guess that means we head for Lima.”

Once they had their destination in mind, it wasn’t hard to hook up with a group heading in that direction. The first thing they’d done, on reaching Mexico, was to obtain the necessary travel documents; now their South African passports would be put to the test. Travelling with a group of young people of varying nationalities should take the heat off them, or so they hoped.

Much to Blair’s amusement, the moment their admittedly elderly hired yacht left the safety of port, Jim retired to the cabin they shared with four others, looking slightly green, and remained there for the duration. He would have been prepared to stay below decks and miss all the fun, if Jim hadn’t made it clear he wanted to be left to die in peace.

Since his sentinel’s demise didn’t seem at all imminent, Blair decided to spare both of them and threw himself into his first sailing lessons with his usual enthusiasm. It was only going to be a couple of days, after all. In fact, this turned out to be a fortunate decision. An hour out from Lima, and with darkness rapidly approaching, Blair managed to persuade one of the yacht’s permanent crewmembers to sneak them overboard and row them to shore, thus avoiding any serious examination of their passports.

They slept under a tree near the beach and in the morning a revitalised Jim was perfectly happy to walk a couple of kilometres to catch a bus into the city.

***

Lima, it seemed, was the self-proclaimed centre of the modern sentinel renaissance. Every street held tourist shops selling cheap souvenirs, maps, and books ranging from the apparently serious to the patently ridiculous, all sentinel related. Blair was momentarily tempted by a T-shirt which proclaimed ‘My Sentinel went to Peru and all he got me was this lousy T-shirt’, but flinched away from a children’s book entitled ‘The Littlest Sentinel’ which featured a sickeningly cute Jaguar cub with enormous blue eyes on the cover.

Unfortunately, there didn’t seem to be any books for sale that contained anything remotely resembling useful information. Undeterred, Blair located the unpromising looking Museum of Sentinel Studies in a tiny, dirty side street and dragged Jim, protesting rather fatalistically, into its dimly lit depths.

They emerged several hours later, blinking in the bright sunlight, and not a lot wiser.

“Okay, well, there were some things…” Blair sank down onto a bench beside a small fountain in one of the tiny plazas that were dotted around the city. “I mean, everyone seems to agree that there were sentinels up in the La Montãna region. And about the jaguar being a spirit guide for sentinels. At least we know they’re right about that.”

Jim shrugged. “Not much to go on. Is it?”

“Maybe when we get there…” Blair sighed and riffled through the tiny Quechua phrase book he’d purchased. “There isn’t really anywhere else to go, is there?”

“I guess not.” Jim smiled reluctantly. “When do we leave?” 

There was an old-fashioned airplane to Iquitos leaving early the next morning. They spent the rest of the afternoon and evening enjoying the non sentinel-related sights and then Blair curled up on one of the airport’s waiting room benches with his head in Jim’s lap and dozed away the few hours left. Once on board, Jim slept, leaning against the window with his jaw hanging slightly open. Blair watched him, only occasionally distracted by the beauty of the passing countryside below.

The further they flew, the more it began to feel like they were coming home. Somehow, it just felt right, and neither Blair nor Jim were questioning that instinct any more, although Blair would have felt reassured if he could have had just one dream.

There was no sign, and Jim hadn’t dreamed of his spirit animal in days either. Still, as they gathered up their belongings and left the plane, Blair felt his spirits lift. It felt like the journey’s end was coming closer.

From Iquitos they travelled up the Napo River on one of the tourist boats, ancient and grimy though it was, and it took the last of their savings. When they landed in that last tiny outpost of civilisation Blair could feel the change that came over Jim. Instead of damping down his senses, Blair could see that he was extending them, becoming the watchman his abilities had designed him to be. His head lifted, nostrils flaring as he scented the air, then tilting slightly to catch some sound far too faint for any normal person to hear.

“Jim, come on, buddy.” He tugged at Jim’s arm and they wandered through the small crowd that had come to meet the twice-weekly boat.

Some of the tourists would be staying in carefully chosen villages, to experience first hand a lifestyle that was millennia old. Others, like the small group of anthropologists and botanists, would be going further afield. Only Jim and Blair had made no plans, a fact they’d taken some care to conceal. The government of Peru was not at all tolerant of tourists who wandered off the beaten track and required rescuing from the consequences of their own foolishness.

They slipped through the rapidly dispersing onlookers and faded into the edge of the jungle, only metres away from the small settlement. A hundred metres into the jungle and they might as well have been on another planet.

“Have you got anything?” Blair shook Jim’s arm impatiently. “Any direction?”

A quick dip of Jim’s head. He turned and took a couple of steps, then stopped. “Are you coming?”

“I’m coming, I’m coming…” Blair grumbled under his breath, but his heart was pounding.

***

Their first night in the jungle was thrilling, and scary as hell. Blair slept huddled against Jim’s side, but still woke at every sound. Whether Jim slept at all, he didn’t know. Jim had retreated into a wary silence and didn’t respond to Blair’s nervous chatter.

On the positive side, he seemed to know where he was going, and how to avoid danger. They stopped frequently in response to signals Blair could not even begin to guess at, moving on only when Jim was satisfied. It occurred to him that there might be no other sentinel alive who could really comprehend what Jim was experiencing now. He was working on an instinct as ancient and as primitive as the jungle that surrounded them.

The second morning, Blair woke alone. For a moment he was too shocked to feel anything, then panic flooded his system. Without Jim he had no hope of survival, let alone finding his way back to the settlement. Luckily, before he had a chance to do something stupid, Jim appeared, sliding silently between the shrubby undergrowth with a small, limp, bloodied body in his hands.

He’d been hunting. Blair gulped back the slightly hysterical greeting that rose to his lips and swallowed queasily. They were getting low on food, but he hadn’t really thought about the fact they were going to have to start killing things with their own hands.

“Wow, Jim…” Uncharacteristically at a loss for words, he blurted out the first thing that came into his head. “Is it safe to eat?”

“Yes.” Jim hunkered down beside him, the bloodied object dangling only centimetres from Blair’s nose. “I gutted it for you.”

It looked like the guide’s duty was to cook. Well, okay, he supposed that was fair. He took the object gingerly. “Okay. Guess I’d better get a fire started.”

Actually, it – whatever it was – tasted pretty good, if a little charred.

The third day was a lot easier. By that time Blair had gotten over his nerves and even though the thick canopy diffused the sunlight so it was difficult to tell which direction they were headed, Blair was pretty sure that Jim was leading them… somewhere. They had some kind of snake for dinner, and it really _did_ taste a lot like chicken.

By the fifth day, he was starting to feel pretty pleased with himself, and totally flabbergasted with the way Jim had taken so easily to the sentinel rôle. Perhaps that’s why, when he suddenly ran into Jim’s back as the sentinel stopped unexpectedly, that he didn’t completely freak out at the sight of five Indians wearing bright woven cloth kilts and body and face paint in red, white and black. Although when he noticed the large crossbows loaded with long slender arrows, it was a close call indeed.

Jim didn’t seem to be too concerned, or surprised. He must have been able to hear them coming, so presumably, he was prepared to trust them. Blair squared his shoulders and moved up to stand beside his sentinel.

Another man appeared from the undergrowth behind the first five, and Blair looked him over curiously, feeling a vague tugging in his direction. Like the others, he wore a kilt and his face was painted with a gleaming red oval mask, but he wasn’t carrying a weapon, and there was an aura of power around him. He also looked pleased to see them. Blair smiled tentatively and the man beamed back at him.

“We have been waiting for you.”

Blair blinked. The accent was different to what he’d heard in the lowlands, but it was at least understandably Quechua. He blessed his ability to pick up the basics of a language quickly. “You knew we were coming?”

“The spirits told me many months ago. We come to welcome the sentinel and his guide.” He tapped his chest lightly. “I am Incacha, shaman of the Chopec. You have come to learn, no?”

“Yes. I’m Blair, and Jim… Jim is a sentinel, but he is blind.” Blair took a deep breath. What would their reaction be to a sentinel who was less than perfect?

Incacha nodded, not appearing to be surprised by this revelation. “There is much to do. You should not have waited so long. Come.”

“Jim?” Blair looked up at his lover. Who was listening to something. When he turned back to Incacha, Blair saw there was a wolf standing on one side of the shaman, and a black jaguar on the other.

Incacha glanced down affectionately at the animals then back at Blair. He seemed to be pleased that Blair could see them. Then the shaman turned and walked back the way he’d come, with the two spirit animals keeping pace. Blair took Jim’s hand and walked between the tribesmen on the path they’d been chosen to follow.

***

**five years later:**

Jim was waiting for him when Blair came out of Incacha’s hut. He wasn’t entirely sure how long he’d been in there, but since it was dark, it couldn’t have been less than a day and by the level of weakness in his legs not longer than two. They were still able to carry him, after all. Once, he’d had to be carried out after a marathon four-day session.

He was standing just on the edge of the trees that encircled the shaman’s hut, leaning one shoulder against a handy tree, waiting patiently. Blair knew he would have waited just as patiently if it had been a month and he felt a surge of love for his sentinel. He also felt hungry, sleepy, weak at the knees and so horny he could hammer Jim into next week and still not be satisfied. All of which were effects he’d learned to expect from the fasting and use of certain herbs required to undertake shamanic spirit journeys.

Blair smiled beatifically and padded across the bare ground, enjoying the swirl of cool night air around his naked body. Toward Jim. Always toward Jim. With the last of the drug still clinging to his system and sharpening his senses, Blair had no real difficulty seeing his lover’s blue eyes light up at the sight of him.

It had taken two years, give or take, for Jim’s eyesight to return under the combined ministrations of Incacha and Mirame, the tribe’s healer. Two years of sensory exercises, herbal treatments and spirit walks guided first by Incacha, and then as Blair’s knowledge grew, by Blair himself. It had been worth every minute, and every foul brew that Blair had promised faithfully to share, to look into Jim’s eyes and see recognition spark into life on that never to be forgotten day.

Hard as it was to believe, all the pleasure that he got from looking at Jim’s beautiful, smooth, athletic body, Jim also felt from looking at his own short, hairy, sturdy self. It didn’t seem like a fair return, but Blair wasn’t about to complain. He _definitely_ got the better part of the deal.

Like all the men in the village, Jim wore only a brief leather pouch to cover his genitals unless he went on a hunting or scouting party. Then they would wear bright, coarsely woven kilts to protect the most sensitive areas of their bodies. Now, in the dark, he might just as well have been naked. Moonlight gleamed on the smooth, tanned body and long legs and he could easily have been a statue, so perfectly sculpted did he look.

As Blair got closer, Jim straightened, unfolded his arms and reached for him. Blair leaned gratefully into the strong, bare chest and took a deep breath, grounding himself in his lover’s scent. He hummed his pleasure softly, still a little too dazed from the spirit walk to be able to put his thoughts and emotions into words. Jim chuckled softly and stroked his hair, which now fell to the middle of his back.

“This is the only time you’re not talking a mile a minute.” Blair smiled dreamily, feeling the rumble of the words in Jim’s chest. Jim kissed the top of his head, which still, after five years, only reached his chin. Sometimes life was so unfair. He giggled faintly and kissed the skin under his lips. “Are you going to tell me?”

Reminded of the purpose of his spirit walk, Blair struggled to get himself under control. His erection must be boring a hole in Jim’s thigh, but Jim was paying it no attention, and wouldn’t until business was dealt with. He sighed, knowing that the news he had to tell Jim was going to sadden him. Both of them, but at the moment he was too caught up in the aftermath to really feel it.

“It’s time to go.” He managed to get that out, and felt the muscles shift under his cheek. “Go back, I mean.”

“Home? Cascade?” Jim’s voice was quiet. His arms tightened a little. “I’ve been thinking about that for a while, but…”

“You don’t want to?” Blair sighed and patted Jim’s back consolingly. “Me either. This feels like home. I’ve been here longer than I’ve ever stayed anywhere.”

Jim sighed. Blair knew he felt the same way. “It makes sense. Now you’re a legal adult.”

Sometime, a few months back, he guessed, he’d turned twenty-one, and that ended the Institute’s legal guardianship of him. Jim, of course, was another matter, but from everything Blair knew about sentinels, Jim had to be one of the most powerful and finely tuned sentinels in a generation. It would be difficult for the Institute to have him locked up as a rogue. Difficult, but not impossible.  They’d have to handle their return very carefully.

“They might have changed the law while we’ve been gone. Maybe they treat guides like sentinels now.” He offered the depressing suggestion hopefully, wanting to be talked out of what he knew they had to do. He turned his face up to Jim’s and was promptly kissed. Then he had to fight off the surge of sheer lust that flooded his body so he could gain control of his tongue. “The Institute isn’t going to want to give up their power over sentinels. It’s how they control them. They for sure aren’t going to want to hear what we have to say about spirit animals and vision quests.”

“So we don’t tell them. We tell the press. We tell all the people who don’t like what the Institute is doing.” Jim kissed him again and Blair’s knees buckled. Luckily, Jim had a firm grip on him. “We show them that you succeeded where the Institute failed. You and Incacha and Mirame.”

“Mmn.” Right now he would have agreed to anything Jim said, just to be able to listen to him saying it. “Fuck me.”

Jim laughed, and it was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard. “Anything you say, Chief.”

“That’s right. Good Sentinel.” Blair chuckled, happily surrendering to the lingering effects of the drugged vapour he’d inhaled during his spirit walk. He draped his arms around Jim’s neck. “Fuck me hard.”

In moments his back was up against a tree, his legs dangling over Jim’s arms and Jim’s cock was buried to the hilt in his ass. He wriggled delightedly, feeling the pleasure zinging through his body. “Y’know, fasting’s a bitch, and those herbs give me a fucking awful headache, but the apher… avro… abradeesiac effect really rocks, man.”

“Tell me about it.” Jim grinned as he began to thrust, hard and fast, just the way Blair liked. “It’s a wonder my dick doesn’t fall off after one of your spirit walks.”

“Ooh, Jim…” Since both Jim’s hands were occupied holding his ass, Blair began to jerk himself off with one hand while maintaining his grip on Jim’s neck with the other. Between Jim and the tree, he wasn’t likely to fall, and besides, he probably wouldn’t care if he did. “Tha’ wouldn’t be good. Harder.”

Jim’s tongue in his mouth made it difficult to talk, and after a while Blair gave up trying. He felt his body tighten and then fall apart as if every part of him was floating in a different direction. It was definitely weird. And then he was suddenly, shockingly, back inside himself and Jim was inside him and he was coming in wave after wave of sensation and Jim was coming inside him and for a moment there weren’t two bodies, just one.

And then he was draped limply across Jim’s shoulder as his sentinel carried him back to their hut, his body still throbbing to the beat of Jim’s heart.

He lifted his head with an effort and then had to close his eyes as the ground swayed with each step that Jim took. “Hey, Jim. Put me down, man. This is no way to treat your guide. ‘S not dignified.”

A snort of amusement and a slap on his backside was all the answer he got.


End file.
